My boss thought I fancied him & made a move at work – but he’d been catfished by my stalker who endlessly flirted as me
WHEN her older male boss became increasingly flirty at work, sickened Abby Furness thought he was overstepping the mark.
But the truth was more terrifying – because her cyber-stalker had posed as Abby to start a fake online relationship with the man who managed her.
It left her boss humiliated and Abby, 25, felt compelled to quit her role after a month, as the atmosphere was so awkward.
“He was mortified and apologetic, he even helped me gather evidence to take to the police,” says the singer and dancer.
“But a line had been crossed and as a young woman at a male-led entertainment company, I didn’t think I could go back.”
When I talk about it now, I cringe and feel sick
Abby Furness
The twisted incident in 2021 was almost the “last straw” for Abby, the victim of a two-year online harassment campaign by stalker Matthew Hardy.
He was a complete stranger but spotted Abby on social media and used her images to target her circle of family, friends and acquaintances, then spread lies.
After leading other women to believe Abby had cheated with their partners, Hardy even duped her then-boyfriend into thinking she had been unfaithful, ultimately destroying their relationship.
But when things became less than professional with her boss, she couldn’t have imagined Hardy had infiltrated that part of her life too.
“It was a month before I found out what was going on,” she says.
“Hardy messaged my boss as a fake Abby Furness, telling him that was my personal number and it was between ‘you and me’.”
Hardy even managed to dupe a photographer who had previously taken boudoir photos of Abby into sharing them with him, which he then sent to Abby’s boss.
“They chatted back and forth for days, had a really sexual conversation. When I talk about it now, I cringe and feel sick,” she explains.
“The conversations got flirtier and flirtier.
“What’s sad is that I liked working for the company and I’d developed a good relationship with my boss, we got on. That’s how I wanted it to stay.”
Abby says the in-person conversations became friendlier and turned into subtle, flirty jokes.
‘It felt messed up’
Whilst Abby felt a line was being crossed, she didn’t want to lose her job.
“I remember thinking: ‘Did he just say that?’,” she recalls. “It felt messed up but I didn’t want to be blunt and rude. I didn’t flirt back but I just let it happen as I wanted to keep my job.”
However, when Abby’s boss made a move on her one day, the truth unravelled.
“I freaked out,” says Abby. “He explained ‘we’ had been talking, showing me the messages.
“Obviously I hadn’t told work about my stalker – I didn’t know who I could trust.”
Abby, from Brighton, had already made multiple reports to the police before the workplace incident, but says she was met with little in return.
‘Paranoid and afraid’
Even when officers knew Hardy was responsible, Abby was not allowed to know his identify until later, leaving her unnecessarily paranoid and afraid.
But this week, safeguarding minister Jess Phillips – who has been stalked herself – announced plans for “right to know” guidance so that future victims can know their abuser’s identity at the earliest opportunity.
Stalking Protection Orders – which can ban alleged stalkers from contacting or being within a certain distance of their victims – will be made more widely available.
Offenders will also be prevented from contacting their victims from behind bars and if the accused is acquitted, courts will still be able to apply protection orders if there is sufficient evidence indicating they still pose a risk.
Abby, who was also stalked in-person by a second man, crazed fan Jamie Spears welcomes the changes.
She says: “It definitely would’ve helped in my situation.
“For two years, I had increasing levels of anxiety and couldn’t trust anyone. I thought my stalker was someone close to me and accused family and friends.
“Had I known his name and that he was a man up north, living nowhere near me, I would have felt safer I think.”
With an estimated one in five women aged 16 and over in England and Wales now a victim of stalking at least once, Abby believes social media is emboldened more abusers – and stringent checks need to be implemented.
“I think all social media accounts should be verified with ID like a passport,” she says.
“It would definitely be a deterrent for some would-be stalkers, nor could you say horrible things and hide behind a fake identity.
“Many people see cyber-stalking is as less serious than in-person stalking. They think it is online so can’t hurt you – but it is scarier in many ways.
This will affect me forever, I’m a changed person now…Every day I am working to get myself back.
Abby Furness
“Rather than a person chasing you down the street, it’s like being followed around by a ghost that no one else can see.
“There needs to be a lot more education about what stalking actually is too and what evidence you need to collect if you think you are a victim.”
The police eventually took action against Hardy, 32, from Northwich, Cheshire, with Abby one of nine victims.
Haunted for life
In January 2022, he was sentenced to nine years in jail after pleading guilty to stalking involving fear of violence and harassment after breaching a restraining order.
Chester Crown Court heard Hardy created fake profiles on social media in order to befriend men and women across the UK and sometimes pose as friends or family in order to gather information about them that would cause embarrassment.
After gaining the trust of his victims, he would send them messages he knew were a lie in order to create rifts.
He broke down the trust of everyone around me.
Abby Furness
Abby, who recently returned to her singing career, is bracing herself for his release from prison, which she expects will happen in 18 months.
“This will affect me forever, I’m a changed person now,” she says. “Every day I am working to get myself back.
“For a long time I stopped singing and dancing, everything I loved, because I felt like I was being watched.
“I’m scared of what he might do when he is free, because I don’t think he has changed. If anything he will have anger towards us for speaking out.”
The performer says appearing in a Netflix documentary about the ordeal earlier this year – entitled Can I Tell You A Secret? – helped her to gain a little closure.
“It felt like everyone took it seriously finally and I could be out in public again,” says Abby, who is in touch with two other women Hardy targeted.
“While I was one of the victims he targeted, there were so many people affected, like my family, friends and old boss. They were duped by him.
“He broke down the trust of everyone around me.”