13 things mentally strong leaders don't do

Strelka Institute/Flickr

• Great leaders avoid bad habits that are a detriment to their mental strength, and others. 
• Instead, they accept their insecurities, and don't suppress their emotions.
• They don't deny their own limitations, and show compassion to others.
• They also stay focused on their own path to success.

My fifteen years as a psychotherapist taught me about mental strength and the resilience of the human spirit. I saw countless people bounce back from overwhelming adversity and beat the odds.

One of the biggest lessons I learned about mentally strong people was that their resilience had less to do with what they did and was more dependent on what they didn't do.

People who resisted unhealthy mental habits had an incredible advantage in life. No matter what hardships, challenges, or setbacks they encountered, they had a superior ability to reach their greatest potential.

Leaders, in particular, need mental muscle to lead their teams through good times and bad. And to make their good habits effective, they need to give up the bad habits that could rob them of mental strength.

Here are the 13 things mentally strong leaders don't do:

1. They don't mask their insecurities

Admitting you're not adept at everything requires humility — which is a true sign of strength. But many leaders want to act tough. Mentally strong leaders, however, refuse to waste their time and energy hiding their weaknesses. Instead, they put their effort into growing better and becoming stronger.

2. They don't make their self-worth dependent upon other's opinions

If your self-worth plummets each time you hear something critical — or skyrockets every time you receive praise — you'll become a people pleaser who can't successfully lead. Mentally strong leaders don't depend on others to validate their self-worth.

3. They don't let their emotions control them

Mentally strong leaders don't suppress their emotions — they are acutely aware of how their feelings influence their behavior. Rather than blow up every time they're angry or bow out every time they're nervous, they're able to regulate their emotions so they can behave productively.