My husband has been suffering with confusion and memory problems but he refuses to see a doctor

DEAR DEIDRE: FOR a while, my husband has been suffering with confusion and memory problems.

I suspect he knows something is wrong and is frightened – as am I.

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My husband has struggled with confusion and memory problems but he gets angry whenever I suggest he gets help[/caption]

He is 70 and I’m 68. I just about persuaded him to see his GP, who referred him to a memory clinic and for a brain scan.

But he says he didn’t ask for any tests, it’s his body and he’ll decide what to do.

DEIDRE SAYS: It is only natural to be frightened of a dementia diagnosis, but that is the door to treatment and support.

Ask the clinic about a home visit. They may be able to provide a general diagnosis without a scan.

Stay calm when your husband is confused but note any changes in his memory and behaviour, as it could help with diagnosis.

If he refuses all appointments, you have to respect that. But continue to say how worried you are about him and be honest when it makes your life harder. You are in this, too.

You can get further advice through Dementia UK (dementiauk.org, 0800 888 6678).

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