Urban Meyer coaching the Redskins is a beautiful disaster waiting to happen

Urban Meyer is suddenly a hot target for NFL teams. The former Ohio State and Florida coach has already been linked to the Dallas Cowboys, and as USA TODAY’s Nancy Armor so astutely pointed out, that would be an epic clash of egos that would make for unbelievable theater.

But now another NFC East team may be jumping into the fray, as Meyer has apparently been spotted at FedEx Field, where the Washington Redskins — who, unlike the Cowboys, already fired their coach — are hosting the Philadelphia Eagles in a drudge match that once held some allure but now just reminds us that we all wish this division would slink off a cliff and into the crashing waves of the sea below.

Man oh man oh man oh man. Who doesn’t want to see Jerry Jones and Dan Snyder in a bidding war? The rest of the country’s billionaires are running for president, so let’s keep these two distracted trying to woo the big fish (who has a penchant for letting things slide and “forgetting” the truth.)

It’s possible Meyer is just there to see former players like Haskins, WR Terry McLaurin or even the still recovering Alex Smith, who he coached at Utah. But a public appearance like this is a strong indication that Snyder wants to make a push.

I’m not sure which of these scenarios I’m more excited for, but I’m leaning toward Redskins now because Jones has at least had success before and could get there again. Snyder runs a football operation about as well as Meyer makes sure assistant coaches on his team aren’t abusive, so the whole thing is sure to be an utter catastrophe.

In case you forgot why Meyer, who won two national titles at Florida and another with Ohio State, is even available, a quick timeline of events:

Meyer was suspended for the first three games of the 2018 season after an Ohio State investigation found that he’d failed to uphold the university’s standards by not reporting allegations of abuse against his assistant Zach Smith by Smith’s then wife, Courtney. And by lying about the situation at Big Ten Media Day. Meyer drew scorn when, given a chance to tell the world what he’d say to Courtney if given a chance, he replied: “I have a message for everyone in this: I’m sorry we are in this situation.” He returned to the Buckeyes and did the traditional national media redemption tour — where a lot of what he said still made no sense — and did not make the College Football Playoff despite a 12-1 record. On Dec. 4 of last year he announced his “retirement,” in part due to concerns about his health. (This is also what caused him to leave Florida, ahead of media reports that showed wide-spread player misconduct within the program.) As he did after leaving Florida, Meyer spent the last season working in television and appears, perhaps, set to coach again.

Pairing Meyer, whose success as a college coach allowed him to lord over a fiefdom where whatever he said was true and correct, with Dan Snyder, whose success as a businessman allowed him to buy a team so he could believe that whatever he said was true and correct, is extremely tantalizing. Snyder’s time with the Redskins, once one of the league’s most prestigious franchises, has been an abject failure. Since purchasing the team in 1999 it has gone to the playoffs only five times; it hasn’t been past the wild card round since 2005.

Snyder’s heavy-handed leadership style has been criticized for the entire two decades he’s owned the team. USA TODAY’s Mike Jones examined the root causes of Snyder’s failures earlier this year:

Several figures throughout the league, who spoke to USA TODAY Sports on condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to speak about the organization, blame Snyder’s decision-making for the failures. When he isn’t meddling, he has left the decision-making to top lieutenants Vinny Cerrato (1999, 2002-09) and Allen (2010-present), who have no track record of success.

Others around the league — some of them former employees, who spoke to USA TODAY Sports on the condition of anonymity so they could speak freely — believe Washington’s never-ending struggles are a result of karma.

They surmise Snyder’s track record of treating people poorly – scrimping on employees’ pay and benefits, suing season ticket holders for trying to get out of their contracts because of financial hardships, clinging to a team name some view as racist – prevents his organization from thriving. Others believe Snyder has sabotaged efforts by refusing to ever hire, or stick with, a head coach he allows to operate with the authority necessary to produce a winning team.

Oh. Yeah. Dan Snyder should definitely hire Urban “Operates with Impunity” Meyer and then try to dictate to him how to do things. We need that.

It worth noting that Snyder already went the Splashy-College-Coach-With-Ties-To-Florida route when he hired Steve Spurrier in 2002, handing him a five-year deal that was the most lucrative in NFL history at the time.

Spurrier lasted two years, going 12-20 before resigning because he resented Snyder’s meddling — like forcing him to use QB Patrick Ramsey.

This time Meyer and Snyder would agree on the QB. Presumably. For a little while, at least.