Bizarre horoscope saying Cancerians are ‘suckers’ & Sagittarians are ‘talentless drunks’ goes viral for brutal readings
LOTS of us turn to our horoscopes for a glimpse inside our future, with it often providing insights into our finances, love life and overall health based purely on our star sign.
But a bizarre reading, said to be from 1979, has gone viral online as it reads more like a brutal, but hilarious, list is insults than an accurate zodiac reading – and some people don’t know how to cope.
The original source of the zodiac reading remains unknown, but was shared by Twitter user Wendy, 19, believed to be from the US.
Captioning the snap, she wrote: “1979 horoscope I am f****** begging you to read this,” which left many eager to find out what the tongue-in-cheek horoscope reading said about them.
While it seems to start off on a positive note, the horoscope starts by praising the “inventive mind” of an Aquarius, but the reading quickly turns brutal claiming that people born between January 20 and February 18 “lie a great deal” and “make the same mistakes repeatedly” because they’re “stupid”.
But they seem to get off easy compared to some of the others, as the horoscope accuses Pisceans of “flaunting their power” and “lacking confidence”, branding them a “dips***”.
It’s not all bad news though, as they are also described as having “a vivid imagination” which, strangely, leads them to suspect they’re being ‘”followed by the FBI or CIA”.
As for Aries people, well, they’re “quick tempered, impatient and scornful of advice”, according to the scope, with it concluding: “You are a p****.”
While Taureans get off more lightly by being labelled “practical and persistent”, Cancerians are “suckers,” according to the horoscope, and Leos are “idiots”.
If you’re a Virgo, though, you might be surprised to learn of your hidden talent, with the horoscope claiming they are “good bus drivers”, but you fall short in the bedroom as you easily “fall asleep’ during sex.”
But the worst of the lot is a Scorpion, according to the scopes, as they “can’t be trusted” because of their “lack of ethics” with the reading branding them as “a perfect son of a b****.”
There brutal reading definitely didn’t spare a soul as is claims anyone who is a Libra are “artistic types”, but will eventually “die of veneral disease”.
Concluding the brutal list of insults, it claimed that all Sagittarians are “drunks” and “not worth the time of day”, while Capricorns are “basically a chickens***”.
The post as since gone viral notching up 231k retweets, almost 500k likes with almost 10k dropping a comment expressing their amusement.
After reading their own savage description, people flocked to the comments to poke fun at the accuracy of the details, many jokingly owning up the negative traits portrayed in their reading.
“‘I cannot STOP reading this, over and over again, like a dire form of self punishment, ” one person wrote, “breathtaking,” they added.
“Damn they went hard on my Capricorns,” commented another, while one joked: “I am a Leo. Candid assessment.”
Whatever your horoscope said about you, we all have one thing in common, and that’s that the internet certainly made us
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