I’m in a job I hate because of my controlling mother

DEAR DEIDRE: I’M in a job I absolutely hate because of my controlling mother. She gave me two choices – finance or medicine.

I left university with a third-rate degree and now work in a bank.

I’m a woman of 28. My husband is 30.

He doesn’t support me in my plan to move jobs.

I want to work for a charity or do something worthwhile.

He says we can’t afford the ­mortgage if I leave work.

He works in horticulture and although It doesn’t pay that well, it’s his dream job.

He didn’t have strict parents so doesn’t understand.

If I hadn’t chosen a financial degree, they wouldn’t have allowed me to go to uni and I needed to get away.

I can’t bear this job.

DEIDRE SAYS: You can’t live your life through your parents, fulfilling the opportunities that they never had.

Talk to your husband again about how miserable you feel. Explain you would like to enjoy work as much as he does.

Ask where you can make cuts so that you can find a job you want to do.

A job where you’ll be happy will hugely improve your relationship and the quality of both your lives.

My support pack on Job Hunting will help you, and one called Standing Up For Yourself teaches assertiveness which will help you to deal with your parents.