My girlfriend always uses her self-diagnosed social anxiety an an excuse when she lets me down

DEAR DEIDRE: MY girlfriend reckons she has social anxiety. She is self-diagnosed and it’s always her excuse when she lets me down.

I’m 23 and she’s 24. I was diagnosed with anxiety by my doctor two years ago.

Soon afterwards, she announced she has exactly the same condition.

I struggle with socialising but I make myself go because I don’t want the anxiety to win.

She hardly goes out now and mostly stays in gaming.

But how can she have anxiety when she’s been out all day with a gaming friend?

It seems very convenient to me.

I’m wondering if it’s all simply a convenient excuse because she can’t be bothered to make the effort with me any more.

DEIDRE SAYS:  Well done for facing your anxiety and pushing against it.

By facing your fears you will build your resilience and ensure anxiety does not completely take over your life.

Your girlfriend may be soaking up your worries and may genuinely be feeling some anxiety.

You would both benefit from counselling. There is also a great charity to help you called Anxiety UK (anxietyuk.org.uk, 03444 775 774).