Meredith Grey was the worst character on 'Grey's Anatomy,' but the show won't survive without Ellen Pompeo

• Ellen Pompeo's final episode of "Grey's Anatomy" as a series regular aired February 23. 
• I don't like her character Meredith Grey, but the show shouldn't even try to go on without her. 
• ABC's hit medical drama has completely new DNA now, so it might as well have a new title. 

I'm no fan of Dr. Meredith Grey. In "Grey's Anatomy," she's a cold, entitled nepo baby, who cares about her patients but maintains a steely exterior. Grey, played by Ellen Pompeo, says she helps and mentors women, but at times she's also been the show's "mean girl" who only supports those in her inner circle, which changes on a whim.

On Pompeo's final episode as a series regular, which aired on February 23, Meredith leaves Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital (named in part for Meredith's sister Lexie Grey) to do Alzheimer's research at the Catherine Fox Foundation. Her final turn in the operating room ends with a patient dying followed by a pitiful, slapdash send-off party complete with sparkling apple cider and the wrong cake.

The episode, titled "I'll Follow the Sun," shows that as much as things change, they also stay the same. Patients die in surgery. Busy colleagues throw underwhelming office events. And even though Meredith's leaving the hospital that essentially raised her, but she'll be back (Pompeo confirmed she'll return for at least the season 19 finale).

In the meantime, "Grey's Anatomy" is trying to fill its Pompeo-sized hole with yet another new class of interns. Meredith's half-sister Maggie Pierce (Kelly McCreary, who joined the cast in season 11) and her sister-in-law Amelia Shepherd (Caterina Scorsone, whose character moved to Seattle on season 10) will likely take on more responsibility to maintain the show's "family vibes." But the truth is, no matter how hard it tries, "Grey's Anatomy" will not last much longer without Meredith Grey. 

As anyone with access to the internet probably knows by now, Meredith is the last member of the original intern class from Shonda Rhimes' pilot to leave Grey Sloan. She's literally and figuratively the last bit of magic to disappear from the series. (The original series characters Meredith, Alex, George, Izzie, and Cristina's names are an acronym for "magic").

Even though I never liked the character of Meredith Grey, Pompeo's exit as a series regular is bigger than any other cast member's exit. She wasn't just any series regular, she was the core of the show's identity. Her departure means that the show now has completely new DNA, so it might as well have a new title, too. 

"Grey's Anatomy" has tried over the years to fill nearly every gap, and sometimes it worked. But most of the time, it didn't. Character departures have caused trauma for viewers and left us with scars, and there's only so much pain we'll endure.

There's a limit to the amount of change fans can tolerate

After Dr. Derek Shepherd's (Patrick Dempsey) death on the show in 2015, Time spoke to the clinical director of the Seleni Institute for Women, Christiane Manzella, about the grief viewers were feeling from his loss.

"Human beings love stories and making connections, even if it's to fictional people. We create meaning and then experience actual grief when that connection is broken," she said.

Still, the reason why so many "Grey's" fans have stuck with or come back to the show after so much heartache is the overwhelming sense of comfort the show provides.

When my favorite characters Dr. Lexie Grey (Chyler Leigh) and Mark Sloan (Eric Dane) died as a result of a plane crash in season eight, I boycotted the show in a fit of rage, but eventually returned and felt more connected to the show than ever thanks to a storyline involving Dr. April Kepner (Sarah Drew) and Dr. Jackson Avery (Jesse Williams).

After Drew and Jessica Capshaw (who played Dr. Arizona Robbins) were written off in 2018, I left with them and never expected to return. I eventually did, when Drew returned to help Williams exit. 

As humans, we can only adapt to change so much before we decide we've had enough. My story is probably just one of the thousands of stories that fans around the world have about why they've grown increasingly tired of a show they once rooted for time and time again.

Narratives have a natural end. Pompeo herself told me in 2021 that she used to often ask people attached to "Grey's," "what story are we going to tell?" and they'd respond, "Who cares, Ellen? It makes a gazillion dollars.'"

Network executives might not care about storylines and character development as much as raking in gazillions of dollars, but thousands of fans who have grown up with the show do. I don't like Meredith Grey, but as a character who defined "Grey's" for 19 seasons, she still held a place in my heart, a heart that's stretched to capacity as new characters come and go and come and go. We'll I'm done. Why should I stretch my heart for a show that's lost its own?

"Grey's Anatomy" is dead. Even though a couple of the original ancillary characters like Dr. Richard Webber (Jim Pickens Jr.) and Dr. Miranda Bailey (Chandra Wilson) remain, a new class of interns can't duplicate the magic. It's not my show anymore and it hasn't even been Rhimes' show since she left in 2017. 

I wish we could all just accept that by pouring some actual champagne out for all characters we loved, and move on.

"Grey's Anatomy" airs  Thursdays at 9 p.m. ET on ABC.