I’m a parenting guru – how to dodge awkward situations including when the tot asks where babies come from
MUMMY, why does that lady have a beard? Dad, where do babies come from?
Our little tots are curious creatures – and although that helps them to understand the world better, it can also make for a very awkward moment.
To avoid any tricky situations, Fabulous chatted to Kirsty Ketley, a parenting whizz better known as Auntie K. on Instagram.
Here’s how to tackle a number of topics they might be wondering about…
Death
According to the whizz, a mum-of-two herself, death is the one concept that can be tricky for kids to understand, especially if they’re younger.
But despite being a dark subject, Kirsty urged fellow parents to not shy away from talking about it.
”When you come across dead insects on a walk, or a family pet dies, use this as an opportunity to explain that nothing lives forever, eventually all living things die.
”When a family member or friend passes away, this will often spark questions from your child.”
The UK-based pro added: ”You may find this hard because you are grieving and upset, but it is important to answer questions as truthfully as you can, but in a way that your child can manage.”
Mummy, where do babies come from?
This question is bound to enter a conversation at some point.
But here, Kirsty reminded, it’s not about sex – your child is too young to understand such concepts.
Instead, try to talk about how babies grow inside a woman’s tummy.
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”The mummy and daddy make a baby, it grows inside mummy’s tummy and then when the baby is ready, it comes out,” the expert said.
”They may want to know why and how, so you can go on to explain that the mummy and daddy have decided that now is the time to grow a baby and when they are older, you will explain exactly how the baby comes out.”
Although it is unlikely that a child of this age will ask for more questions, be prepared for the exactly how a baby gets in a mummy’s tummy.
If this is the case, the parenting whizz noted it is best to be fairly honest – but in a way that suits their understanding.
”Try not to get flustered as then your child might sense there is something not quite right and they may then think having a baby is something to worry about,” she added.
Why does she have a beard, dad?
We’ve all been there – it’s so quiet you can hear a pin drop, and suddenly your tot asks very loudly: ”Why does that man have only one leg?!”
However, whilst it is important for your child to understand others’ feelings, you shouldn’t tell them off, especially in front of everyone.
According to Kirsty, you should find a way to distract the child and reassure them you’ll explain it at home.
“Wow! Look at that big green tractor!” or “Look what I have in my bag!”
Why is a cow called a cow?
This is an answer you’re probably looking for yourself and you might be tempted to say: ”I don’t know.”
If this is the case, Kirsty said the best thing to do is say you will both look for the answer together.
”Being curious and having a desire for knowledge is a really good thing for your child to have.
”It encourages their imagination to develop, they become more creative, and it helps them to grow a larger vocabulary.”
She added: ”Think of curiosity like a muscle – it needs to be regularly exercised to strengthen, therefore, as annoying as these questions might be, do try and answer them.”
Horrible news events
The news are often filled with dark events the true nature of which your child might struggle to grasp and comprehend.
But whilst they might not need the whole truth, you shouldn’t also pretend everything is okay when it’s really not.
This, Kirsty said, will send the kids mixed signals, which will make them even more anxious.
”You can tell them that you also find it upsetting and that it is okay to feel that way, then offer them the opportunity to talk things through and explain that you can help.”
The expert recommended: ”I always recommend that children watch Newsround as they are brilliant at explaining things in the right way.
”Teenagers need to be shown where to find reliable news sources, rather than what they may be seeing on TikTok or YouTube, and parents should try and set an example by doing the same.
The mum-of-two also advised to keep an eye on how much news your child may be exposed to.
”Perhaps keeping news bulletins to a minimum on the TV and radio.”