Christine McGuinness reveals she wants to conquer ‘terrifying fear’ after opening up on ‘unhappy’ marriage
CHRISTINE McGuinness is determined to conquer a “terrifying fear” after leaving her “unhappy” marriage to husband Paddy.
The mum-of-three has turned her life around after being diagnosed with autism two years ago.
She now hopes to travel the world with her kids after realising her condition was restricting her.
Christine told the Mirror: “I’ve always wanted to travel. I’ve always wanted to go and try all different things. and I know now I am fully able to.
“I’m excited for life. I want to live as much as possible.
“I need to live forever because I’ve got three little children, but I really need to live for me too. And I want to.”
The model and reality TV star has made a new BBC film about her autism.
In it she opens up about being raped in her adolescence.
She says meeting Paddy aged 19 soon after that incident made her feel safe.
Christine, who split with Paddy, 49, last year, said of their 15-year relationship: “I know that I’ve stayed in a place where I was probably unhappy because it was safe and I don’t like change.”
The model, 34, added: “Before Patrick, I had been sexually abused, I was raped. I used to pray every night that I wouldn’t wake up in the morning because it was so awful.
“When I met my husband that was a time when I was very safe and I wonder if that’s why I stayed.”
Christine, who has twins Leo and Penelope, eight, and Felicity, six, with Top Gear host Paddy, makes her candid confession in a BBC1 show next week.
Autism has a range of characteristics, such as social interaction problems.
Christine was only diagnosed after her children were found to have the condition.