I have a thing for my close friend but she won’t leave her abusive boyfriend

DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my mate told me that her boyfriend had made her have sex with other men so he could watch, I was horrified.

He’s clearly taking advantage of her but she won’t leave him.

She’s 29 and I’m a woman of 30. We’ve been friends since school.

She’s been with this guy, who is 34, for six months.

Lately, she’s seemed very withdrawn. But when she revealed what he’d made her do, she was sobbing.

I told her it was abusive, but she said she was drunk and didn’t say no.
Her being treated like this makes me so angry.

This man seems to have some sort of hold over her.

Maybe I am jealous, as I’ve always fancied her and she just friend-zoned me. But that’s not why I’m worried. I really want to help her.

DEIDRE SAYS:  Nobody should be forced to do anything sexual against their will.

You’re a loyal friend and your concern is valid. But she is an adult and if she chooses to stay with her man, there’s little you can do.

Give her my support pack on Abusive Partners and urge her to get professional help.

Simply because she was drunk, and didn’t say no, doesn’t mean she gave consent.

Keep talking and listening to her, so she knows you are there for her.