For Sale: Fast Car

With apologies to the great Tracy Chapman.

This car is your ticket to anywhere. Just cruising in it feels like you’re entertaining yourself. It speeds so fast it feels like you’re drunk. Which, let’s be honest, is not recommended. I don’t want to feel like I’m drunk or buzzed while I’m driving; I want to feel safe and secure and, hopefully, get good gas mileage. I’m thinking maybe a Hyundai Kona or a Mazda CX-30.

Those cars might not be fast or powerful, but they offer a bit more stability. I had a job at a convenience store. Then once I was on track for a managerial position, they replaced half the staff with automated screens they purchased from a recently closed Wawa. Still, I managed to save a little bit of money and pay all my bills. But then all my bills steadily rose while my wage stayed the same. My electric bill got out of hand. Switching to high-speed internet costs an arm and a leg—and don’t get me started on the installation fees.

I had a feeling I could be someone. And I was right. After working in the market on the checkout line, I went for a drive in my fast car and saw city lights lay out before me. I knew I had to make a decision: Leave tonight, or live and die this way. So, I went to my boyfriend and gave him an ultimatum: Either we both get jobs, finally see what it means to be living, or it’s done. He left me the keys to the fast car and stayed out late drinking at the bar.

I got in the fast car, had no plans, wasn’t going anywhere, and I drove. It felt so fast that I could fly away. Then suddenly, I was airborne and flying. The struts on the fast car gave out quicker than my ex would leave for twenty-five-cent wing night with their friends. AAA came and dropped the fast car off at the mechanic. Apparently, in addition to the struts, the catalytic converter also needed repair. Don’t worry, it’s been replaced, and you should still have thirty thousand more miles if you buy the car.

I was sitting in that AAA truck with my fast car strapped to its bed when I figured out my plan: I didn’t care about getting promoted, buying a bigger house, and moving to the suburbs anymore. All my friends who moved to the suburbs really wished they lived in the city anyway. I started from zero and got nothing to lose or prove. I needed to fix up the fast car and get out of there. So, I upgraded the stereo system, fixed the brakes, and cleaned the intake filters. And I’ve moved to a beautiful one-bedroom in the city with three different subway lines a block away. That’s the main reason why I’m selling the car.

I’d always hoped for better, and through the journey of the fast car, I’ve found it. And because of that, I’m only looking for the Kelley Blue Book value of the car. It might have some issues, but it’s still a very fast car.