PREMIER LEAGUE TV RIGHTS INTRIGUE + BRACING FOR PAIN

Happy Saturday my friends, the football is mostly international this week, so I mostly switch off, but there are a few interesting stories doing the rounds.

The big one: Folarin Balogun.

The guy is about as American as an English fry-up, but that hasn’t stopped him going on a whistle-stop tour around the states, making appearances at basketball and baseball games. The word on the street is he is going to pledge allegiance to the red, white, and blue of USMNT and become the tip of the spear for the biggest world cup of all time in 2026.

Did I call this way before this chatter started? Yes. Why? It makes so much sense.

1. It guarantees him a place in a World Cup squad. Could he maybe be an option for England? Possibly. Kane has to retire at some point, but would you trust Southgate to pick the best player? I wouldn’t, not after seeing what happened to Ben White.
2. USMNT team is pretty damn good, but it lacked a finisher at the last World Cup. There will be a group of very good young players coming into first teams over the next 2 years with high ceilings, but there’s no decent strikers. Balogun has very little threat to being number one.
3. Commerically it’s hard to imagine there’s a bigger job on the planet in 2026 than being the face of US men’s football at American/Canadian/Mexican World Cup. He’ll get a huge deal, he’ll be on all the posters, and he’ll make a fucking fortune.
4. Post Career, it’s quite hard to get jobs. But if you drop 2 7 out of 10 games in a World Cup, you’re made for life here. His profile will be monstrous if he does well in front of the home supporters.
5. Can you imagine the fun he’s going to have? The celebrity he’ll attain? The stories he’ll have to tell? America is on the rise when it comes to football and he could be a real tipping point for them with regards to quality. He could be one of the best strikers in Europe, a genuine star, and he’ll fast-track all the accouterments of success by making this move.

I’m excited for him. He’s de-risking a World Cup place. That is a sound move if ever I saw one.

Also, I’ll get to meet him when he comes to the MIGHTY St. Louis at some point and maybe we could be best friends?

Talking of American SOCCER BALL, there were some SPICY hot rumours that Apple is thinking about buying out the rights for Premier League. Now, this would be complicated because the deal is very big, and the fight for it represents an existential threat to Rupert Murdoch… but we’ve written about the smarts of the deal for a long time here.

In Silicon Valley, attention is the currency, and what better currency that Premier League eyeballs? The most popular league in the world with no sign the love is letting up.

You know what else makes sense? The product isn’t optimal. The fan experience is bottom of the pile when it comes to priorities for the clubs. It’s money, money, money. Apple have tried to change that in MLS, so here are things that you need to know about what they could bring to Premier League.

1. They took 68 different kick-off times under ESPN and condense all the games into basically two days. Saturday night is the main night for football, kick offs are between 530-730. Wednesday is the second night, same thing with the times. What this has done for American fans is make it clear that Saturday night is MLS night. It makes planning your life around football so much easier.
2. You get all the games. There are no black outs (that is basically the name for English fans not getting 3pm kick offs). It’s all in one place. MLS season pass is light Apple TV for games. Every game is on the app, they upload the final cut after the game, and they highlights ready to go very fast. Right now, for Premier League I need some form of cable for NBC, then I need the Peacock app, and sometimes you need a local channel. It’s complicated, it’s a mess, it’s not about the fans.
3. Club rooms are the go to points for information. What is that? It’s a club controlled space on Apple TV that gets updated every week with the goings on at the clubs. You can put First Team reports on there, give updates on Academy teams, you can do pretty much what you like as long as it’s not sponsored. This gives clubs an immense amount of control when it comes to narrative… and all the eyeballs are tuned into the work.
4. Apple integrates the MLS Season pass into the phone in a way only Apple can. The notch at the top of the phone acts as a live scoreboard. Your lock screen runs play-by-play via text if you’re in a meeting. You can customise your notifications to give you whatever information you need in realtime. It’s a beautiful clean experience.
5. Continuous improvement is at the core of the product. The product isn’t static like it is in Premier League. Apple treats it like one of their phones models. They are constantly prodding/tweaking at how it looks, works, and delivers joy to the fans. None of this ‘it is what it is’ type stuff fans deal with at the moment. MLS has a proper partner and I tell you this… the fans love it. It’s prestige stuff.

I’m game for it; you should be too.

Ok, Haaland. There’s a lot of conspiracy theories that we’re being MUGGED off by the dark arts. He’s out with a groin injury, he’s going to a local hospital that has City investment, this injury is a JOKE.

But… I don’t think so.

If City wanted to preserve Haaland, they’d have faked an injury BEFORE he left. Flying him to Spain for a camp ain’t the way to preserve legs. You also don’t tend to have international coaches in cahoots with clubs like this. He was exited from camp by the Norway doctors. They probably ran an abductor squeeze test before losing him. Can he shake off a groin issue in 2 weeks? Doubtful. Especially if he can’t train.

Bigger picture here? There will be casualties for City. They have 6 extra games at a minimum. That will take its toll. They haven’t been that invincible when they’ve had to play 3 games in a week. We’re all concerned that our squad can’t handle the remaining games, but don’t take your eye off them.

The biggest outstanding issue we have to deal with is Bill Saliba. This back injury hasn’t had a public resolution, which one would assume means it’s not as simple as a back spasm. It’s time to embrace the idea that Arteta is going to have to get his pencil out and start thinking about how we can cope without a player who feels indispensable.

My gut? Rob Holding is the guy.

Arteta would prefer to play a centre-back as a centre-back than fuck around with things that are already working. Zinchenko at right back? Why would we do that to ourselves? Partey moving into defence? Why?

We also forget that he had a lot of good games last season. Spurs is seared in the memory because it felt like a ground zero moment that he starred in. But I think if we’re honest here, he was probably asked to play like hard pressing monster by Arteta, because his style in the opening 30 wasn’t him at all. I am VERY doubtful he’ll be asked to play that way again.

What we all forget is Rob Holding coming in from the cold and dropping winning 90s against Chelsea, West Ham, and Leeds. He is more than capable of doing a job, I just hope it’s a short one.

Out of the remaining 10 games, the only two games you fear for him is Liverpool and Manchester City. But again, let’s be fair here; it’s not like our two main centre-backs have been any better against those two teams.

This is part of the process. You have to lean into your squad. Backups have to be a part of the story. Let’s see what he can do… but also, please pray for Bill Saliba.

Before I go, Arsenal announced that they will be coming to America this summer, to play the MLS All-Star game.

Matt Turner’s preparing the Gunners for a stateside trip to remember.@Arsenal will face the best of MLS in Washington, DC, for the 2023 #MLSAllStar Game presented by @Target! pic.twitter.com/hYuCW0eb0y

— Major League Soccer (@MLS) March 21, 2023

This will be great for the Arsenal brand. It’s great for MLS. Maybe, just maybe, there will be a player from our team there, but even if there’s not… did you notice the St. Louis CITY sc stadium in the top right in the main video?

Damn, I’m blushing out here. Thank you, Arsenal.

Right, that’s me done. If you want a RAP from Johnny Cochrane, get on the Patreon right now.

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