I’m a mom in her 40s who compulsively buys inappropriate clothes I’ll never wear – my bosom is straining for dominance
A MOM’S habit of buying wholly unsuitable dresses, never to be worn, has triggered similar shopping memories for her followers.
They also totally understood her compulsion that has left items, with labels still attached, languishing in her wardrobe.
But Emma (@emvexed) does not seem tormented by her bad shopping choices.
Instead in her video, she had some fun, revealing some of her questionable buys to her 97,000 followers.
She did it all firmly with her tongue in cheek, even if her experiences were very relatable.
“A 40-something woman who compulsively buys inappropriate clothing she’ll never wear,” she despaired.
A tiny 5′ 1″, she dreamt of wearing long, floaty, romantic dresses.
But as Emma has learned to her cost, the vision can often be very different from reality.
Despite temptations to buy more, she decides to explore her wardrobe for inspiration.
“In a peculiar moment of self-restraint decide not to buy another dress,” she said emphatically.
With a look of firm resolve, she insisted: “I’ll put on one of the many I already have.
First off the hanger is a pretty long dress with long sleeves and a high neck with frill detail: “Look at the colors, look at the print,” she said.
It had never been worn since it had left the store, and, after trying it, Emma decided it should stay that way.
“So I wonder why exactly I bought it,” she said with incredulity as she gazed at her reflection.
“I look like Nanny McPhee in her ditzy spring era.”
Time for another dress, and she retrieved a green print number, that skimmed her ankles.
“Right, next look frivolous and flirty,” she said.
But there was a fitting issue around her breasts: “Fortunately my back fat is straining for dominance as is my heaving bosom,” she observed.
Finally out came a silk, green dress, and there were fitting issues with this one too.
“Got this in the sale. Maybe this one will fit me even though it’s two sizes too small,” she admitted.
“One moment I think it fits but then I breathe out and the buttons cling on for dear life.”
Emma, having tried several dresses, eventually gave up, grabbed her wooly hat and long puffa jacket, and headed out to stand pitch-side as her son played football.
Nonetheless, many of her post’s viewers related to it and found her storytelling very funny.
“As usual, your posts make me laugh and also make me feel so appreciated for not being the only one like this,” revealed one fan.
The experience of yearning for a dress to look good was shared by this follower: “I always buy the floaty dresses in the hope I channel Sienna Miller but end up more Mamma Cass than Mamma Cass,” she said.
Finally, another viewer who loved Emma’s post: “Hilarious. Like us all we think we’re 6’ like the model but in reality, I’m only 4’8”.”