Gazza let off firecrackers in our hotel toilet, I thought it was a bomb and ran outside stark NAKED, says Julian Dicks
AS WEST HAM prepare for a first European final in 47 years, legendary former captain Julian Dicks has released an autobiography about his decade at Upton Park.
The star never won a senior England cap despite being one of the best full-backs in club football.
Now 54, Dicks reckons one episode with Paul Gascoigne while away on Under-21s duty may have inadvertently created a “dim view” of him in the eyes of the England hierarchy.
He revealed: “I first met Gazza when I was playing in the two-legged FA Youth Cup for Birmingham and we got drawn against Newcastle.
“They beat us 2-1 that night at St Andrew’s and I remember thinking to myself after the game that he was a decent player — but he wasn’t that good.
“That was until the second leg when we went up to St James’ Park and they hammered us 7–1. Gazza just ran the game from start to finish.
“He was unbelievable, absolutely incredible. After that game, I revised my opinion to: ‘F*** me, what a player he is.’
“He spent a lot of his time off the pitch inhabiting a different planet, too, as I found out when we both played for England in the 1988 Toulon Tournament in France.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have been so ready and willing to share a room with him.
“The thing about Gazza is he was the most brilliant bloke, incredible fun to be with, always laughing.
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“He obviously loved a drink, so we got on very well.
“But the only problem with him as a room-mate was that he just didn’t sleep. Which really didn’t bode well in terms of me getting any rest.
“And when he didn’t sleep, he then had to keep himself entertained.
“One night when I was enjoying my kip, I didn’t know it but Gazza was busy preparing a little show for me.
“The crazy Geordie had bought loads of firecrackers and had carefully lined them up around the rim of the toilet, before lighting them all.
“You cannot imagine how loud the noise was that woke me up.
“I absolutely s*** myself, sprang out of bed, ran straight out of the room and into the hotel corridor, without a stitch of clothing on, with my hands covering my privates.
“I was convinced a bomb had gone off, until I saw Gazza emerge from the room laughing his head off. Pretty soon, the hallway was full of people.
“Not only other players and coaches, who had come out to see what all the fuss was about, but England bigwigs and their wives.
“And all of them had been greeted by the same view, which was me standing in the middle of the corridor, totally naked, with my hands protecting my modesty.
“Gazza got away with it as I ended up taking most of the blame.
“I actually think there was a good chance that episode contributed to the dim view that was taken of me by the England management in years to come, helping to tarnish my reputation, which meant I never got a full England cap or call-up.
“Years later, I bumped into John Gorman, Glenn Hoddle’s assistant when he was in charge of England, who had some unusual advice if I wanted to get into the first team.
“We were both in Tenerife one summer and I was going into Lineker’s Bar, as he was leaving, so we met on the stairs.
“He said that if I wanted to play for England, I had to let my hair grow on my closely-shaven head.
“ ‘F*** off!’ I replied and walked straight past him into the bar.
“I thought to myself: ‘You’ve got drug abusers, alcoholics and wife-beaters all playing for the national team and you are now telling me to grow my hair!’
“Making a stupid comment like that was a sign that they didn’t really want me anyway.
“John actually denies saying it to me but my recollection differs.”
Hammer Time, by Julian Dicks, £22, is out tomorrow.