I’ve met the woman of my dreams but the age-gap is raising eyebrows
DEAR DEIDRE: I’VE met the woman of my dreams but she’s old enough to be my mum, and then some.
She’s 61 and I’m a 28-year-old guy. I’ve never had much confidence around women.
I work in IT for a call centre and the job is OK, but I don’t have many friends there.
The lady I’ve fallen for works in our canteen.
She is very friendly and started chatting to me but I’d just smile, walk away and sit down on my own.
Then she began to make a point of coming over to my table and wiping the it down or bringing me a glass of water.
She was really bubbly and fun. I suddenly realised that she was coming on to me because she keeps making comments about sex.
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I wasn’t sure if she was doing it to poke fun at me and to make me feel uncomfortable — just like the bullies did to me at school — but then I found that she was being serious.
She was asking me if I had a girlfriend and then she’d say things like, “I bet you spent all weekend in bed with your girl, isn’t that right?”
I told her I didn’t have anyone and she said, “Ooh, you can take me out anytime, my lovely.” She meant it.
We’ve been on a couple of dates now. She likes going out for dinner.
We have such fun together and I feel invincible when I’m with her — especially when people see us holding hands.
They can’t work out if we are a couple or mother and son.
Yesterday, though, we were walking home after a meal and a guy in a van shouted “paedo” at her.
She was upset and it got me thinking that we were making a mistake trying to make this work.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: It really isn’t anyone else’s business. If you are both free agents, you aren’t harming anyone.
The difficulty comes with the question of settling down or wanting children, or perhaps she may want to retire while your career is just taking off – you’re both at very different life stages.
She may have children around your age or older. How would they feel about your relationship?
If it’s just a bit of fun for now and you both know what you want from one another, then enjoy it while you can.
My support pack called Age Gaps – Do They Matter? will help you think about the issues that you may have to face in the future.
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Pictures posed by models.