DEAR DEIDRE: MY husband has hidden his porn addiction from me for ten years.
Now I feel I don’t know the man I married, and I don’t know what to do.
I’m 54 and he’s 55. We’ve been married for 27 years.
Over the past decade I’ve had suspicions that he’s been watching porn, but he’s always denied it.
He even accused me of being paranoid.
But when his laptop died, I got someone round to look at it. When it turned on again I saw his browsing history.
He’d been watching videos of young women doing disgusting things, every single day.
I confronted him and he finally admitted the truth, saying he was ashamed but couldn’t help himself.
I don’t know if I can forgive him. He promises he’ll stop but how can I trust him?
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DEIDRE SAYS: Porn can be as addictive as any drug, and your husband is likely to need help to stop.
Encourage him to contact thelaurelcentre.co.uk (01926 339594) which offers sex-addiction therapy and porn addiction counselling.
Read my support pack Upset By Pornography? which should help you to understand more about this.
He lied because he was ashamed. If you want to try to repair your marriage, counselling could help. Try tavistockrelationships.org to find a suitable counsellor.
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