My sister keeps forgetting my children’s birthdays – should I cut her off?
DEAR DEIDRE: MY sister keeps forgetting my children’s birthdays.
We’ve always had a difficult relationship, but now I’m at the point of breaking off contact with her.
I’m 44 and she’s 41. My two children are ten and eight.
She has children too and claims being an auntie is important to her. She says she loves my kids and she knows when they were born.
Yet every year she forgets one or both of their special days. No card, present, call.
If I say anything, she claims she was so busy, she lost track of time.
But she has a packed social diary, and never forgets to go on holiday or to a party.
My kids have started to notice her behaviour, as when she sees them she makes promises she doesn’t keep.
This year, I was so annoyed, I didn’t bother sending her children anything. She rang saying she was upset.
I know it was wrong to take it out on her kids, but I’ve had enough.
What should I do?
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DEIDRE SAYS: Your sister sounds self-centred – a taker. It’s understandable you’ve had enough of her.
But before you break off contact, which will impact your kids and hers, it would be wise to discuss your grievances.
My support pack, Standing Up For Yourself, should help you talk to her. And it might be helpful to discuss everything with Family Lives (familylives.org.uk, 0808 800 2222).