My partner won’t sleep with me but still enjoys watching porn

DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN we first met, my partner told me he was a very sexual person and I loved the physical attention he gave me.

But over the last year or so he’s really lost his sex drive.

First it dropped to once a week.

Now it’s once a month – and only if he wakes up in the middle of the night wanting some action.

It’s never when we are awake.

He says he just doesn’t feel turned on any more but he admits pornography and the models he looks at on Instagram still do it for him.

I’m 31 and my partner’s 34.

It makes me feel like he doesn’t fancy me and it’s hard not to take it personally.

I’ve tried everything from talking to him about it to not talking about it, wearing sexy lingerie and offering to have a cuddle which doesn’t have to lead to anything, but he’s just not interested.

He barely wants me to touch or kiss him.

DEIDRE SAYS: Many adults enjoy looking at pornography but perhaps he is watching too much.

When it starts to affect your own sex life, then you know it’s a problem.

Porn sites push the viewer on to more and more extreme footage which can blunt the appetite for normal sex.

The person then pleasures themselves without the need for a partner.

My support pack on Internet Pornography Worries will help you to discuss this with him.