My sister-in-law cares more about her looks than their family home

DEAR DEIDRE: MY lazy, selfish sister-in-law is paying thousands for cosmetic surgery yet she lives with my brother and nephew in disgusting conditions.

I’m so worried about them. Their house is dirty and untidy with take-away rubbish left lying around for weeks.

There are dirty litter trays everywhere and the walls are covered with black mould.

They never have any money and are frequently asking family for help with bills.

My sister-in-law is 27 and her teeth are awful so she’s going to Turkey to get them fixed.

She is totally delusional about what they can afford. I’m lucky enough to be able to loan them the money for bills, but I can’t keep doing it.

How do I say something without upsetting my brother?

He is 30 and the only one who works or does anything for my nephew but I can’t just ignore the state his girlfriend chooses to live in.

DEIDRE SAYS:  You can’t make financial decisions for them.

It is up to them to live as they please, even if you do feel their home is a mess. But you can stop lending them cash, as it enables them to be unaccountable for their own finances.

The mould is a different matter, and may be a health risk.

If they rent their home there is now a law to stop landlords letting a property get into this state.

Read more at gov.uk/government/news/government-to-deliver-awaabs-law.

Pictures posed by models.