I spent £10,000 on marrying myself after never meeting Mr Right – I bought my engagement ring and had stag and hen dos
LIKE many little girls, Sarah Wilkinson dreamed of a fairytale wedding with the man of her dreams by her side.
But when she realised there would be no Prince Charming Sarah spent £10,000 marrying herself.
The 42-year-old promised to love, cherish and obey herself, and never give up control of the TV remote, vowing to be her own “knight in shining armour”.
Sarah bought herself a diamond engagement ring, her wedding invites came with the slogan “groom not included”, her cake topper was a bride kissing a frog and, after the ceremony, she threw a fake champagne bottle instead of a bouquet.
Sarah even celebrated on a stag night as well as having a hen party.
Sarah, a credit control assistant, had her friends Carina and Kelly as bridesmaids and walked down the aisle with her mum Barbara Glanfield watched by 40 guests before being joined by another 80 for an evening reception.
She said: “The day was everything I hoped it would be.
“It was so wonderful and I didn’t miss having a man by my side at all.”
Sarah says she hasn’t ruled out finding a groom one day but, in a trend sweeping America, wanted to marry herself as an act of self-love and independence.
Sarah’s only long-term relationship began when she was 28 and lasted for four years.
She spent a decade looking for Mr Right then gave up waiting after trying internet dating, describing it as “horrendous.”
She said: “Nobody seemed to be who they said they were.
‘A big cheer’
“One guy said he was 35 and when I challenged him he admitted he was 17 but liked cougars. It was a compliment but I gave it a big ‘No thanks’.
“In the end I stopped specifically looking for an opportunity to date.
“The bottom line is I’ve never met Mr Right but I’m from a generation of women who always thought they’d get married.
“When I was little I used to dress up in a net curtain and plastic tiara and shoes and pretend to be a bride.
“By the time I was 15 I was convinced I’d have twin boys and triplet girls and the big house with the white picket fence.
“But as time went on I realised it might not happen, so thought, ‘Why not marry myself?’”
After the most recent Covid lockdown Sarah said she realised she might never get her wedding so bought herself the engagement ring she had always dreamed of.
She said: “I’d always wanted a solitaire over a carat, so I went out and bought myself one that was 1.1 carats.
“I’d finally got my rock and, after a few months of wearing it, a few friends enquired if I’d be having a wedding.”
Initially she told them no, but as she had always wanted the dress, she though why not go for “the whole shebang”.
So she started planning her wedding in January this year.
Sarah said some pals were mystified by the move yet others were supportive.
She explained: “Most people who know me said it was such a ‘me’ thing to do.
“Unfortunately there were a couple who said, ‘We just can’t get behind you, it’s ridiculous’, but I’d tell them it’s not for everyone. It was a special day for me, not them. In the main, most people were really happy for me.”
Sarah lost a stone in preparation for her special day, dropping to 11st 7lb by trimming portion sizes and using a weighted exercise hoop, alongside swimming and zumba classes.
Like any bride, she searched to find that ideal dress but some boutique owners were left stunned by her solo wedding.
She said: “Going wedding dress shopping was, for me, the start of this awesome journey and the start of feeling like a bride, something I never thought I’d get to do.
“I wanted all my friends there to share it with me and the boutiques were somewhat unimpressed with having an eight-person entourage.
“But then I found a great place that sold off-the-peg dresses and found the perfect sparkly dress I’d always wanted.”
Sarah hired a wedding planner and events company CMA, of Felixstowe, Suffolk, to create a purple-themed do and hired two Range Rovers to take her to the Grade II-listed Harvest House mansion in Felixstowe. “The best bit was when I arrived and got out of the car,” said Sarah.
“I’d told everyone I’d be late by an hour, in the best bridal tradition, and everyone was waiting for me outside the venue and a big cheer went up.”
After walking down the aisle to A Thousand Years, by Christina Perri, then walking out to This Is Me, from film The Greatest Showman, Sarah and her guests smashed open a pinata disguised as her wedding cake.
Sarah, who lives just outside Felixstowe, decided to keep her bouquet made of silk flowers so her two bridesmaids and guests were left to catch a dog chew shaped as a champagne bottle instead.
Friend Katherine Cresswell, of The Savvy Wedding Planner in Ipswich, was the perfect fit to organise the event.
Katherine said: “It was the first time I’ve ever organised a wedding without a groom and it was fantastic.
“Sarah and I have been friends for about 25 years so I was thrilled to be asked. Ceremonies like this are lovely and I think more people should have solo weddings.
“It all ties in with love and self-care.
“It’s about not relying on anyone else to bring you happiness and fulfilment.”
Sarah’s mum Barbara, 69, wasn’t disappointed the wedding came without a groom.
She said: “It’s something completely different which I’ve enjoyed helping organise and I get to be a mother of the bride.”