I ended my relationship – so why can’t I stop stalking his social media?

DEAR DEIDRE: I ENDED my relationship because I was deeply unhappy – so why do I keep stalking my ex on social media?

My ex-partner is in the Army and he’s 40. I’m 36 and female and we’ve been together for five years. 

He moves around with his job and although I want to marry, I didn’t want to live in Army quarters.

It made us argue a lot because I want to have a normal civilian life and he’s not prepared to change. He is committed to his career.

I am a teacher and I want to settle down near my work and have a family. He does not. He was happy with the way things were.

We couldn’t agree so I ended it. Now I look at his social media first thing in the morning and when I get in from school.

I don’t always like what I see. Sometimes he has his arm around another woman.

It breaks me to see him. I know I must move on but how?

DEIDRE SAYS: The first obvious thing to do is to block his profiles on your social media. Seeing him is making you feel worse and holding you back.

If you are certain that you don’t want to reconcile or are ready to find a compromise, then do yourself a favour and stop tormenting yourself.

If you think things could be different, make contact with him and ask how he is feeling. My support pack Relationship MOT may help.