I met my boyfriend on a LinkedIn group. We were long-distance for 11 years and just bought a house together.
Courtesy of the author
- When I started a graphic-design business, I connected with another business owner on LinkedIn.
- We connected easily, which quickly turned to romance; we sometimes talked on Skype all day.
- We were long-distance for 11 years, then bought a house; we learned love can overcome many things.
In September 2011, I was at a low point in my life. It had been a hellacious six months of sharing the same space with my husband while we planned our divorce. Having been a stay-at-home mom for seven years, I struggled to find a full-time job. Eventually, out of sheer frustration, I started my own freelance graphic-design business. I'd managed to snag a few gigs by word of mouth but continued to energetically promote my business online. One way I did this was through LinkedIn groups.
That December, I noticed a "follow along" post in one of my business groups, in which you post the link to your business' Facebook page and follow the others in the thread. We were instructed to not only like the Facebook page, but to also leave a little note saying we were from the business group on LinkedIn.
Following an obscure business page had an unexpected result
One business I followed had a logo that I baffled me. It was a hand-drawn collection of objects floating in space — which told me nothing about the business — but I dutifully liked the page and left a note. A few moments later, I saw the owner of that business had liked my business page and left a note in return.
At the same time, I had my 100th follower on my personal blog. Curious and excited, I clicked over to look; lo and behold, it was the same person. He had left the usual comment that he had come from the LinkedIn group, so I replied, "You're my 100th follower! Thanks, you're the bomb!"
His punny response was, "I have been told by some I have an explosive personality." I said something along the lines of, "How did you find my blog page, by the way?" He answered that he had his certificate in Facebook stalking, which I found amusing.
His name was Brad, and he proceeded to immediately message me on Facebook to apologize for following me across the internet. He then asked if I wanted to work together because he thought our businesses would be a good fit. I was a freelance graphic designer, and he created a Facebook app that allowed users to gift products and services to others. I wasn't sure our businesses would be a good fit, but we continued to chat.
Despite the distance, our relationship quickly flourished
At one point, I threw an "Alice in Wonderland" quote into the conversation, and to my surprise, he responded with another "Alice in Wonderland" quote. That launched us into a conversation about books, which was followed by a discussion about movies and TV shows. We continued to message continuously for two days about everything under the sun. We had so much in common. He asked if we could switch to Skype, which we did. I had already looked up his photo and found he looked like a handsome English professor — I was interested in more than friendship at this point.
I found out he lived in Reno, Nevada, while I lived in south-central Pennsylvania. I was still technically married. Though neither of us knew exactly where this was going, we kept talking. At one point, I consciously decided to jump into a romantic relationship with him, despite the distance.
Soon, we were finishing each other's sentences and leaving Skype on 24 hours a day, talking while we cooked, working in companionable silence, and even going to sleep while still on Skype. By week six, we were saying "I love you." He entertained my 2-year-old, who chatted with him and showed him her toys. The first person my middle son read to at 6 years old was Brad over Skype.
My mom and sisters were worried I was visiting an ax murderer
A year later, I scraped the funds together to fly out to Reno to meet Brad for the first time and have a visit with him while my kids were with my ex. We spent a blissful week together, punctuated by regular text messages from my mom and two sisters, who were worried I was visiting an ax murderer or, at the very least, visiting a scammer of some kind. We enjoyed meals out, cooked together, went for walks in the city, and watched our favorite shows together. I went home knowing Brad was the one for me.
My kids and I flew to Reno three years later to visit him. We couldn't afford lots of back-and-forth travel, so this was my second visit with him. Then he drove to surprise me three times over the next few years, showing up at my townhouse and staying at a local hotel. Last year we all — even the dog — went on vacation together to a beach in Delaware, where we spent a week relaxing and enjoying the ocean.
A total of 11 years went by, during which we dealt with numerous issues: dealing with layoffs; stabilizing our finances; getting my divorce finalized and custody case worked out; and enduring the pandemic.
We learned love can persevere
In 2022, I started looking into buying a house and moving out of the tiny rental in which the kids and I had been living. I talked about the process with Brad, and he pointed out that we could get a house big enough for all of us if we pooled our resources. So in May 2023, we bought a house together in south-central Pennsylvania.
The kids and I moved in June, and Brad drove across the country to move in with us the first week of October. Our 12-year anniversary is on December 14. We've learned a lot about ourselves and each other along the way, but we mostly found that love can persevere and overcome many things. We enjoy spending the days together, doing everyday things such as making meals, running errands, and enjoying time with the kids. We anticipate making many more memories together from now on.