A millennial mom begged 'toxic' boomers to stop pushing children into unwanted conversations with strangers, igniting a debate about socialization

• A millennial mom wants boomers to stop forcing kids into unsolicited conversation.
• She said a stranger approached her daughter at Target and kept commenting on her appearance.
• Many empathized, while others mourned a "sad" world where strangers could no longer connect.

A millennial mom went viral requesting that "toxic" boomers stop forcing kids they don't know into conversation, recounting the time a woman repeatedly commented on her daughter's appearance at a Target. She added that modern moms are trying to "break the toxic cycles" of self-loathing that previous generations have instilled in them.

The TikToker @kay.n.zee, who creates parenting-focused content for 64,000 followers, posted a PSA of sorts in October, where she recounted the time a "boomer" approached her family while they were shopping and told her daughter she was "so pretty." @Kay.n.zee's daughter didn't respond, so the TikToker thanked the woman but explained that her daughter doesn't talk to strangers.

But the stranger persisted, eventually asking the two-year-old: "You don't think you're pretty?" @Kay.n.zee said she told the woman her daughter knows she's beautiful, but reiterated that she doesn't talk to strangers.

"Why would you even plant that idea into her head?" the creator said in a TikTok hashtagged "#toxicboomers" with 2.8 million views. "Millennial and Gen Z parents are working so hard to break the toxic cycles of self-loathing and self-hatred that boomers instilled in them, but it's like every chance that they get to puke it out onto an innocent child, they take it."

@Kay.n.zee added that on a separate outing, a "boomer man" had complimented her daughter's "perfect olive complexion," and asked where her dad was from.

While she's OK with simple pleasantries, the TikToker said in a follow-up video, trying to force her daughter into a conversation — and not respecting her boundaries — crossed the line.

In another video last month responding to a commenter who asked her to delineate what an appropriate boundary would be for these interactions, @Kay.n.zee emphasized that socializing in public is important. However, pushing young children to engage is not appropriate.

"Personally I don't mind the interactions; as long as my daughter is fine with it, it's fine with me," she said. "If a child is not responding to you after one or two times of you trying to talk to them, you shouldn't try to lure a response out of them like that woman did."

The clips ignited a debate on parenting across generations, with some saying they too felt uncomfortable with strangers approaching their children, and others mourning a future wherein strangers could no longer connect.

"They spent so much time telling us about stranger danger, just to become the strangers we weren't supposed to talk to," one viewer wrote, bemoaning these boomers. "I've had boomers try to reach into the pram bassinet to TOUCH my newborn son," another added. "Like no maam we're just trying to grocery shop."

At the same time, @kay.n.zee said she garnered a fair amount of criticism, including people calling her "a little brat," "rude," and "despicable." One commenter wrote, "What a sad freaking world where you don't want anyone to talk to your children."

"When did I say that?" @kay.n.zee promptly responded.

In addition to her stance on conversations with strangers, @kay.n.zee has shared other "controversial parenting choices" she's made in raising her daughter, including no forced interactions or hugs, and no blindly respecting elders. She also reserves screen time for when her daughter isn't feeling well, and has taught her to not associate sweets with reward or guilt.

@Kay.n.zee did not immediately respond to Business Insider's requests for comment.