More sex, less arguing: 2 women share how weight loss drugs have changed their relationships

• The boom of weight loss drugs is helping more and more people successfully lose body fat.
• Many of these people are discovering new, more confident versions of themselves.
• This can affect relationships, whether couples are having more less or arguing less. 

Since she started taking semaglutide, and later tirzepatide, last fall, Elizabeth Wood has been through the usual stages that patients can expect on these buzzy new weight loss drugs.

She's lost 125 pounds, her appetite is now almost non-existent, and she's stopped buying junk food.

A side effect that she didn't expect, however, is that she's arguing with her husband less.

"We don't have as many petty arguments just because my mood is so improved," she told Business Insider.

Weight loss and relationships have always been subtly intertwined. When trying to stick to a calorie deficit or meal plan, having the support of those around you can be make or break. Some partners don't like losing their eating or drinking buddy and having indulgent date nights replaced by wholesome hikes, so they may find themselves subconsciously sabotaging their efforts, or consciously cajoling them to give up.

But with the boom of appetite-suppressing weight loss drugs like semaglutide (marketed as Wegovy but commonly referred to as Ozempic) and tirzepatide (Zepbound or Mounjaro), this tension has taken on a whole new dimension. People are navigating lives with new priorities, and drastically smaller appetites and bodies, and their partners are being taken along for the ride.

Losing weight, gaining confidence

Patients can lose more than 20% of their body weight on these life-altering drugs known as GPL-1 agonists, which are prescribed alongside exercise and healthy diets, although — as was the case for Wood — quitting highly processed fast food isn't difficult when you can no longer stomach it.

For the 26-year-old who lives in St. Louis, Missouri, the post-GLP-1 version of herself is more confident, with a better mood and a higher sex drive.

"Because I'm happier, things are just better all around," Wood, who has been with her husband Geoff for 12 years and married for nearly two, said.

Dr. Beverly Tchang, an assistant professor of clinical medicine at Weill Cornell Medical College who works with weight loss patients dealing with relationship challenges, told BI that she has seen many people on these drugs, whether single or in a relationship, develop more confidence.

In fact, a 2022 study on 1,441 bariatric surgery patients found that single people who underwent the weight-loss treatment were more than twice as likely to get married within five years. Married people who had the surgery were more than twice as likely to get divorced.

The study's lead author Wendy King, a professor of epidemiology at Pitt Public Health, said relationships were a motivating factor for people signing up to take part in her research — in the hopes that the surgery would boost their chances of finding a relationship or improving their existing one.

GLP-1s seem to have done that for Wood, who says her newfound confidence means she's now more keen to go on dates with her husband.

Ashley Dunham, another GLP-1 patient, has been given the boost she needed to go out with her girlfriends again. She lost about 105 pounds over 16 months on semaglutide after she started taking it in the summer of 2022.

"I don't feel embarrassed of how I look when we go out and take group pictures," the 32-year-old, who lives in Jacksonville, Florida, told BI. "So I have been prioritizing time with my friends without our husbands and kids and doing things for myself that I probably before felt a little bit too selfless to do."

Dunham said she is experiencing "skinny privilege" for the first time in years and has more self-worth: "I don't feel guilty for showing up and existing in spaces that I didn't feel like I traditionally belonged."

Weight loss drugs can lessen desire for food — and sex

Not only do the women's differing social priorities reflect how GLP-1s can affect patients in a variety of ways, their opposing sex drives do, too. Wood didn't notice her libido reduce on the drugs "at all," similarly to patients in the 2022 bariatric surgery study where those who lost the most weight were more likely to feel an increase in sexual desire. But Dunham's desire for sex and food are "pretty much on par."

This chimes with previous reporting by Insider on how these drugs that work on the brain's reward circuits can affect desire for not only food and sex but alcohol — so much so that they could one day be used as a treatment for addiction.

"You know you need it and you know you want it, but it's just not there," Dunham said of her desire for sex. "Some days it feels like a mental task instead of a physical and emotional one." With one small-scale study on men without weight issues finding next to no difference in sexual desire after four weeks on GLP-1s, more research on this topic is needed.

"As much as I love my husband and we've been together for over a decade, it has nothing to do with him and everything to do with me," she said.

Tempted to try tirzepatide

Either way, Dunham's husband is supportive of her taking semaglutide, not least because restaurants now invite the couple out for complimentary meals since she's shared her GLP-1 journey on TikTok and she's become an influencer. Plus, he likes her new look. If anything, he's more concerned about himself.

Both Dunham and Wood said their husbands have been considering taking weight loss medication themselves after seeing their wives' success.

"The most interesting part of our relationship now is that he just lives off of my leftovers," Dunham said. "I always make the joke, I've lost all this weight, and you've put on a little bit more because you're eating all of the food that I can't eat anymore."

"He is very tempted to try it," Wood, said. "He's lost a little bit of weight just based off of my diet, because I'm not cooking the same foods as I was before."

Tchang said that when one half of a couple loses weight, it can prompt the other to question their own lifestyle.

"A spouse might be watching you lose weight and wondering, 'What am I doing wrong? What is she doing right?' And there could be complex dynamics developing there," Tchang said. "We talk to our patients about all of these issues, both before we start the medication, but during the medication as well, and we try to sort out with them, does this still feel like the right direction for you?"

For some, the new spotlight on each other's bodies can become uncomfortable.

Weight loss drugs as a life-long commitment

Barry Tacktill, 51, and his wife, Debbie Schubert, both started taking Ozempic in February. While she quit due to the side effects, which can include nausea, diarrhea, and constipation, Tacktill stuck with it and had lost 41 pounds by July, the WSJ reported.

Doctors widely consider the weight-loss drugs a life-long commitment, and it's common for the pounds to pile back on once a patient reaches their goal weight and stops taking them. For some, the unpleasant side effects or the over $1,000-a-month price tag can become too much. All this can put strain on a relationship.

Tacktill told the publication that Schubert had made hurtful comments, telling him he may regain the weight and that he "still has a belly," leading him to think his wife may resent him. Schubert said she was sorry to have hurt his feelings and is happy he looks and feels better.

As for Wood and Dunham, neither of whom experienced long-term, unpleasant side effects on the drugs, they're working out how to navigate their new lives with GLP-1s likely as a new constant, at least for the foreseeable future.

"It's been fun to just rediscover how many other activities there are out there that have nothing to do with food and everything to do with making memories," Dunham said.