Taylor Swift Did Not Write the Argylle Book, So Why Do Swifties Think She Did?
No one knows who wrote Argylle, the book that inspired Matthew Vaughn’s forthcoming movie of the same name — a Romancing the Stone–style spy caper about a hapless novelist, played by Bryce Dallas Howard, who gets mixed up in the very spy nonsense she makes her career writing about. All we know is the author goes by the pseudonym Elly Conway (the same name as Howard’s character; Vaughn’s film is a meta take on the novel), she was born and raised in New York, she wrote her first book while she was waitressing at a late-night diner, and she is working on more in the Argylle universe. Beyond her Penguin author bio page: She posts about brunch on social media, she has maybe also gone by Ellie, and she is not Cat Connor.
Pseudonyms are not uncommon, but this one has unspooled more red strings than most, long before the Argylle book (published on January 9, 2024) or the movie (set to release on February 2, the first of several Vaughn has planned). Elly Conway is “elusive,” the Hollywood Reporter wrote back in 2023. She is “fishy,” an anonymous source told the New York Post this month. Given the timing of the book’s release and the fact that it is copyrighted by Vaughn and Guy Ritchie’s production company, Marv Quinn Holdings Limited, you would be forgiven for thinking, Oh, the person behind the pseudonym is probably Vaughn … or his screenwriter, Jason Fuchs … or another uncredited writer on the project … or Vaughn’s wife, Claudia Schiffer … or Vaughn’s pal Daniel Craig … or a collection of uncredited writers on the project. Either way they are affiliated with the movie’s production company, which is doing a great job of promoting its spy thriller by whipping up intrigue around Elly Conway’s identity. (Vaughn has cleverly avoided confirming or denying anything.)
But no, that is too simple for Swifties. Taylor Swift’s fans started in on the Argylle mystery not long after the film’s trailer — poppy and colorful and set to Elvis’s “Suspicious Minds,” with the likes of Dua Lipa, Henry Cavill, and Samuel L. Jackson appearing alongside Howard — featured a Scottish fold in a backpack, an image that is essential to Swiftian iconography. A conspiracy theory bloomed from there: Taylor is Elly, Elly is Taylor, a pile of evidence accumulating across Reddit and TikTok. Sources close to Vanity Fair rejected the theory last year, but that hasn’t stopped the Swifties, who really ought to pool their investigative abilities into something useful, like infectious disease research. And unfortunately, there’s just enough evidence that I’ve found myself, against all better judgment, indulging the theory.
Here is that evidence, starting with the most compelling:
1. Elly Conway’s first Instagram post was on Taylor’s birthday. Okay!
2. Chip the cat (in a backpack) follows Taylor Swift on Instagram. Sure.
3. Elly Conway has posted from Caffe Reggio, walking distance from both Electric Lady Studios and Swift’s Cornelia Street apartment.
4. Taylor Swift sells an argyle sweater. Hmmm.
5. Taylor Swift wears a sweatshirt that says Conway Recording Studios in this Instagram post.
6. Taylor seems to point to the letters “ELLY” in the “Anti-Hero” music video.
7. Elly Conway is the same name of a character on the Australian soap opera Neighbours who first appeared on — you guessed it — Taylor’s birthday. We’re spiraling now.
8. Elly Conway (as played by natural redhead Bryce Dallas Howard) has red hair, just like Taylor Swift in the “All Too Well: The Short Film” music video.
9. The silencer on the gun in the photo is actually a Pat McGrath lipstick that Swift is known to wear.
10. Something called the “112 days theory” dictates that something will happen on February 2, 2024 — 112 days after October 13, 2023, the day that the Eras Tour opened in theaters. The “112 days theory,” as defined by Swiftipedia is “the theory says that since the eras tour, taylor releases stuff.”
At this point in the body of research, my eyesight starts to go blurry. Is any of this convincing? Well, like all things Swifties look into — yes, and no. Yes, in that the movie’s account is baiting these conspiracy-theorizing Swift fans. No, in that this all feels like a shameless ploy to incite the curiosity of a fanbase that recently helped make a certain concert film very theatrically successful and that could argue that Taylor Swift lives in my home with just enough clues (the presence of a single dollar, the Joe Alwyn vehicle The Souvenir Part II on Blu-ray, and 1989 on vinyl).
There’s one word that comes to my mind when it comes to the filmography of Matthew Vaughn and that’s — don’t kill me here — “cheap.” The director’s splashy Layer Cake gave way to a series of early aughts and 2010s action flicks that boasted a kind of economical entertainment: the sweary Hit-Girl (Chloë Grace Moretz) in the Kick-Ass movies, the anal joke finale of the first Kingsman movie, the (spoilers!) mid-movie fridging of the titular Kingsman in the Kingsman prequel, The King’s Man (sorry). Barring his mid-aughts charmer Stardust (holds up), the director is eager to indulge gimmick and eye roll-inducing twists to aggravate and delight audiences. It’s frustrating for some to not know who Elly is, but if one thing is certain in the Vaughn universe, it’ll be just as frustrating once we find out.
Until then, I guess it doesn’t hurt to ask: Does anyone recognize this crystal dealer?
Related