Married neighbour says he wants me, has sex with me and completely blanks me
After months of flirting with my married neighbour, we finally gave in and slept together.
The build up was so incredible and he didn’t disappoint when we fell into bed together.
The sex felt so intense and I really thought we’d made a special connection but from that moment on everything changed and now he refuses to speak to me.
I’m 35, and I’m a single mother of an eight-year-old girl.
My neighbour is 46 and is married with two sons and a daughter.
His youngest and my daughter quickly became friends so I saw him and his wife a lot.
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From the very beginning, I suspected that he had a crush on me. His constant longing stares and flirty remarks were hard to ignore.
As time passed I found myself thinking about him more and more.
Every time he’d come around to pick up his kids he’d often linger, and soon started making up random excuses to pop in.
He started confiding in me about his strained marriage.
Then one night he popped around when my daughter was at her dad’s.
We knew what was coming and went straight upstairs to my bedroom.
Afterward, he told me he wanted to be with me.
But after he left everything changed. He stopped coming around and every time I see him he glances at me and walks away.
I’ve tried to speak to him but he doesn’t want to know.
I feel so hurt and confused.
Does he regret what he did? Did it mean nothing?
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: The moment you acted on your fantasies, reality came crashing down for him.
He might be arguing with his wife, but being ready to walk out on her and his children is another matter entirely.
If you had continued this affair, it’s very unlikely there would have been a positive result.
While it could be that he reciprocates your feelings, he’s clearly distancing himself for a reason.
Hard as it may be to see, this man is doing you a favour and at least he isn’t stringing you along.
Any rejection is hard to process, and this is right on your doorstep so will be more challenging to escape.
Allow yourself time to lick your wounds, then when you are ready, pick yourself up and get out socialising again, ready to meet someone who is available for a relationship.
I’m sending you my support pack Your Lover Not Free to explain the pitfalls of this kind of relationship.