Hush-money texts reveal tawdry bidding war over a porn star, a Playboy model, and their tales of Donald Trump

• "I have a blockbuster Trump story," a lawyer for ex-Playboy Bunny Karen McDougal teased in a text.
• "I will get you more than ANYONE," the National Enquirer's editor answered, adding, "You know why."
• Prosecutors say the ensuing text chain ensnares Trump in a conspiracy to alter the 2016 election.

There were veiled threats, laughable delay tactics, million-dollar demands.

And behind the scenes through it all, prosecutors allege, stood Donald Trump — a presidential candidate eager to quash the sordid tales of a porn star and Playboy Bunny on the brink of the 2016 election, but unwilling to part with a penny of his own to do so.

For nearly four hours on Tuesday, jurors in the Manhattan hush-money trial were led through long scrolls of text messages from the five months leading to Trump's election.

Their guide to these sometimes ribald texts was one of their authors, key prosecution witness Keith Davidson, an LA-based lawyer who repped ex-Bunny Karen McDougal and porn star Stormy Daniels.

Both women claim they had affairs with Trump during the early months of his marriage to Melania Trump.

As Trump listened from the defense table, Davidson described the frantic attempts to bury both women's stories by selling them to the National Enquirer.

Trump's then-attorney and "fixer," Michael Cohen, was the hyperactive front man for these two so-called "catch-and-kill" schemes, Davidson said.

But Trump was calling the shots, his testimony suggested.

"He was highly excitable — sort of a pants-on-fire kind of guy," Davidson said of Cohen.

Jurors smiled as the lawyer continued describing Cohen.

"Frequently, I'd be on the phone with him, and he'd take another call, and he'd be talking out of two ears," Davidson remembered on the witness stand.

"Sort of like that movie, 'Up,' where the dog says, 'Squirrel! Squirrel!'" he added to some laughter from the jury.

Cohen was a proxy for Trump, Davidson stressed Tuesday, making an important point for the prosecution.

Manhattan DA Alvin Bragg has alleged that Cohen opened his own wallet to pay the $130,000 hush money payment that silenced Daniels 11 days before the 2016 election — but did so only for Trump's benefit.

Trump is charged with falsifying business documents to disguise as "legal fees" what were actually monthly reimbursement checks he paid to Cohen throughout 2017, his first year in office.

"Every single time I talked to Michael Cohen, he leaned on his close affiliation with Donald Trump," Davidson testified.

"It was part of his identity," the lawyer told jurors of Cohen. "He let me know it at every opportunity he could that he was working for Donald Trump."

Trump was so integral to the deals that his frugality nearly quashed the Daniels catch-and-kill effort, according to a series of texts between Davidson and the National Enquirer's then-editor-in-chief, Dylan Howard.

Trump was perilously "tight" when it came to paying hush money, the two men agreed in their texts.

"I can't believe Cohen let this go. It's going to be a shit show" if Daniels takes her story elsewhere, the Enquirer editor complained in an October 18, 2016 text shown to jurors on overhead screens.

"I bet," Daniels' lawyer texted back in agreement.

"All because trump[sic] is tight," the Enquirer editor texted back.

When Daniels' lawyer responded "Yup," the Enquirer editor responded, "I reckon that trump[sic] impersonator I hired has more cash."

"Lol," Daniels lawyer responded.

Prosecutor Joshua Steinglass, who was conducting Davidson's direct examination, appeared eager to forge this link between Trump and the scheme to silence Daniels.

He asked his witness what he thought the Enquirer editor meant by calling Trump "tight."

"That Trump is frugal," Davidson answered.

"That they had this deal sort of on a silver platter," Davidson continued. "And the only reason it didn't 'fund' is that he didn't want to spend money."

Cohen's stall tactics on Trump's behalf were so obvious as to be laughable, the lawyer also testified.

At one point, Cohen blamed Yom Kippur for the delay in getting the $130,000 together, Davidson testified.

At another point, Cohen claimed the Trump Organization computer systems were, "quote, all fucked up," Davidson told the jury.

"He stated you can't believe what we're going through," Davidson testified, continuing to describe Cohen's stalling on the $130,000.

"The Secret Service is here, and there are so many firewalls," Davidson said Cohen stalled at another point.

"I never got your emails!" Cohen claimed at another point, the lawyer said.

"I called him and said, Michael, this is a very bad situation," he said he told Cohen.

"And then he said, 'God damn it, what do you expect me to do? My guy is in four, five different states'" campaigning, he said Cohen told him.

"I thought he was trying to kick the can down the road until after the election," Davidson added.

Jurors were told just that in opening statements.

Trump had hoped to forestall paying Daniels until the election, Steinglass had said in openings, after which it wouldn't matter if she told her story at all.

Meanwhile, Trump has fought the charges by distancing himself and his campaign from the payments to Cohen, which he's argued actually were legal fees.

Davidson on Tuesday led jurors through a half-year's worth of texts with the Enquirer editor.

"I have a blockbuster Trump story," he teased the editor in the June 7, 2016 text — the first the jurors saw on Tuesday.

That was the story of his client Karen McDougal, the former Playboy Bunny — and 1998 Playmate of the year — who says she had a ten-month affair with Trump that began in 2006.

"I will get you more than ANYONE," the eager National Enquirer editor answered less than a minute later, adding, "You know why…"

The "why" was Trump, according to the prosecution theory.

At one point, the two texting men — Enquirer editor Howard, and McDougal attorney Davidson — bartered over the former Bunny's story of a 10-month affair with Trump.

"Get me a price on McDougal," the editor texted on July 23, 2016.

"How about 1m now," her lawyer responded, asking $1 million for the story. "And 75k per year for the next 2 years as a fitness correspondent."

The editor looked askance at that high a figure.

"I'll take it to them," he responded. "But thinking it's more hundreds than millions."

Ultimately the Enquirer paid $150,000 to catch and kill McDougal's story, prosecutors say.

Trump has consistently denied sexual encounters with Daniels and McDougal.

The now-GOP-frontrunner has also denied that the money he paid Cohen throughout 2017 was for anything other than legitimate legal fees.

Davidson's testimony is scheduled to continue Thursday morning.