‘I’m in poverty’ woman slams millionaire boyfriend for leaving her with ‘no money for basics’ but no-one’s on her side
WHETHER you’ve been together forever or barely five minutes, money can often cause issues in relationships.
One woman has slammed her millionaire boyfriend for leaving her in poverty with no money for the essentials – but few people are on her side.
If you are questioning why anyone would side with her boyfriend, you might change your mind after reading her original post on Mumsnet.
According to the anonymous woman, she and her long-distance boyfriend initially met through a mutual friend with a relationship blossomed over the next few years.
While his business thrived, hers had struggled during the pandemic and she also had to deal with health issues.
Thankfully, her partner had repeatedly come to the rescue when money got tight.
In a lengthy post, she explained: “He has helped me financially and has been extremely generous, kind and supportive towards me and I would have ended up homeless without his support, as he provided the funds for me to move to a rented property.
“I have no savings, or financial security and have become completely dependent on him financially.”
With her trying to rebuild her finances, the forty-something had become increasingly resentful of her other half’s £1.5 million bank account.
Especially, as she often had to ‘beg’ for help.
She complained: “He helps me with money whenever I need, for things like food and essential bills when I am short, but I generally have to ask / beg for his help, which I hate doing as I find it humiliating and degrading.
“Sometimes I have asked him to help with a specific amount and have to explain to him what the money is needed for, but sometimes he will only help with half, or less than half of what I need.
“I recently ran out of heating oil and no money for food shopping or basic essentials and he told me no, he cannot help me at the moment, as he has just had to pay out thousands of pounds for his annual property/car insurance etc.”
With no credit card to use as a backup, the woman also claimed that she was in danger of becoming homeless as her landlord was about to sell up.
“I am not sure if he is enjoying the control he has, or if he genuinely doesn’t realise my situation,” the user wrote, adding: “Is this financial abuse?”
Needless to say, her post has broken the internet.
After sharing her story on the Am I Being Unreasonable forum, nearly every user sided with the woman’s other half.
One pointedly wrote: “No it doesn’t sound like financial abuse. He could be fed up of the amount you are requiring from him, so often. It’s not sustainable.”
Another agreed, arguing: “I’m sorry you’re going through tough times, but it’s your responsibility to live within your means here. This guy has no responsibility to you as far as I can see.
“You sound like you expect a sugar daddy set up which he’s obviously not comfortable with. It’s certainly not financial abuse.”
A third even accused the Mumsnet user of ‘manipulating’ her partner.
They pointedly commented: “Yes, this does sound like financial abuse. You are manipulating him into giving you his money when he has no financial obligation to you whatsoever.
“You are then gaslighting him by acting as though him giving you money is preventing you from managing your own finances effectively.”
Others were furious that the woman had accused her spouse of being ‘financially abusive’.
An infuriated reader said: “You REALLY need to look at what you’re saying. You could be unintentionally ignorant, or just an awful person. It’s up to you what you want to be.”
If you are concerned that you are financially abused, the Fabulous team have put together a checklist of red flags for to watch out for.
How to spot financial abuse
If you concerned you might be in a financially abusive relationship, here are the warning signs you need to look out for.
- They force you to hand over control of your bank accounts, savings and investments
- Controls what you can and can’t spend money on
- Stops you from accessing your bank accounts, as well as loans and credit cards
- Asks you to prove what you’ve spent your money on
- Sets up direct debits or standing orders in your name without permission
- Asks you to handover secure information like pin numbers and passwords
For anyone who has expierenced similar issues to the above, you can reach out to charities such as Surviving Ecconomic Absue.