Christina Applegate admits 'I don't enjoy living' as she faces 'real depression' amid ongoing battle with MS
When it comes to her battle with multiple sclerosis (MS), Christina Applegate says she faces "real depression" on a daily basis.
In a new episode of "MeSsy," the podcast she shares with Jamie-Lynn Sigler, the "Dead to Me" actress opened up about her daily mental health struggles and explained why she "doesn't enjoy living" anymore.
"I'm in a depression right now, which I don't think I've felt that for years," said Applegate, who first revealed her diagnosis with the chronic disease in 2021. "Like a real, f--- it all depression where it's kind of scaring me a little bit because it feels really fatalistic. I'm trapped in this darkness right now that I haven't felt like... I don't even know how long, probably 20 something years,"
CHRISTINA APPLEGATE ADDRESSES FUTURE AS AN ACTRESS AMID MS DIAGNOSIS
"This is being really honest... I don't enjoy living. I don't enjoy it. I don't enjoy things anymore," she added.
A representative for Applegate confirmed to Fox News Digital the episode was recorded shortly after Applegate's appearance at the Emmy Awards in January.
While Sigler, who was diagnosed with MS over 20 years ago, understood, she urged Applegate to look at the positive.
"It's so hard to live in a disabled body. It is so hard. I will not take that away from you and I am right there with you," she said. "But what makes it harder is when you compare it to how it used to be. Once we get you to this place where we're accepting that this is how it's going to be, maybe forever… [Living with MS] is not a reason enough for you to stop living because I sit here across from you, and you still make me laugh like nobody else can. You still make me smile. You make me feel loved."
"I can't let you give up. I can't. I need you to do it for me," she added. "I'm hoping that this podcast will also show you even more of your value and show you how incredibly strong you are and how much you deserve to give yourself a chance."
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Despite her ongoing struggles, Applegate admitted that she's "avoided" seeking therapy due to fear.
"I have avoided therapy since I've been diagnosed because I'm so afraid to start crying and that I'm not going to be able to end crying," she said. "I just am so, I'm so afraid for those floodgates to open and that I won't be able to stop."
Sigler encouraged her friend to fully feel those emotions.
"You can't keep pushing it away, otherwise you're going to be where you're at right now. You're like in a purgatory, you know?" Sigler said.
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Applegate revealed her diagnosis on Twitter (now, X) in 2021.
"Hi friends. A few months ago I was diagnosed with MS," she wrote.
"It's been a strange journey. But I have been so supported by people that I know who also have this condition," Applegate continued. "It's been a tough road. But as we all know, the road keeps going. Unless some a--hole blocks it."
In a separate post, she added, "As one of my friends that has MS said, 'We wake up and take the indicated action.' And that's what I do."
In her first lengthy in-person interview since she found out about the illness, Applegate opened up about the "hell" she has been living in.
"I live kind of in hell," she said during a "Good Morning America" interview in March. "I’m not out a lot, so this is a little difficult, just for my system. But of course, the support is wonderful, and I’m really grateful."
In April, the actress revealed she had been suffering a "pretty bad" relapse amid her battle.
During an episode of her podcast with Sigler, the "Married…With Children" alum detailed the severity of her symptoms and how they were impacting different areas of her body.
She told Sigler that she couldn't sleep due to movement problems in one of her eyes.
"I haven't slept for 24 hours because my eye is doing something weird, where every time I close my eye to go to sleep, my right eye starts to shift like this," she said. "I couldn't sleep because every time I would close my eyes, my eye would start doing, like, crazy s---. So I have been up for over 24 hours."
During a 2022 appearance on "The Kelly Clarkson Show," Applegate realized there were warning signs for years that she had MS.
"I started thinking about the last four years, and I had very small symptoms," she said. Applegate added that she thought it was important for people to know that.
"Let's not all be hypochondriacs and run to the doctor when our leg gets weak," Applegate said. "But it happened to me four years ago where we were on set, and I'd go like, 'I think I'm tired, you know?' So it presented itself like a few years ago until it just got as bad as it did."
Fox News Digital's Lauryn Overhultz and Ashley Hume contributed to this post.