Lauren Boebert Thinks It's One Nation, Under God and Lauren Boebert

On Tuesday night, Lauren Boebert—the vaping, groping, gun-loving idiot from Colorado—won the crowded Republican race for Colorado's 4th district, which she switched to after winning re-election by less than 600 votes in Colorado's 3rd district in 2022. In February, I wrote "No One Wants to Vote for Lauren Boebert" which, whoops. Guess not. But when she announced she was officially switching districts in December, GOP voters in the area largely seemed annoyed that she thought she could just switch districts and still get elected. And in January, Boebert was heavily mocked after a local debate in which she failed (or refused) to define “carpetbagger,” a Civil War-era term for someone who moves somewhere else for financial or political gain. She's also made national headlines for a string of scandals, including her divorce in 2023, and that time she groped her date and then got kicked out of a local production of Beetlejuice. More recently, she said the 10 commandments should be displayed in every classroom in America. But none of that seemed to matter to Colorado's 4th...Boebert defeated five other Republicans for the seat, winning 43.4% of the vote. It's worth repeating here that this seat only opened up after Rep. Ken Buck said he was retiring partly because there are so many election deniers in the GOP. “Tonight we had a priority, and that was to glorify and honor God," Boeber said at a watch party after the win, according to the Daily Beast. "To praise the name of Jesus, to invite the Holy Spirit to be present, not only in this room, but in Colorado’s 4th District, throughout Colorado, and throughout the United States of America!” Yikes. She continued: “We know that our rights come from God, not corrupt politicians. Your rights that you have been endowed with are not the government’s to legislate away, to reason away, to purchase away, and that is what I will always continue to fight for." Weird though since abortion is literally a right that state governments are legislating away. But anyway. In all honesty, it's a pretty terrifying win that, as Business Insider writes, "exposes the nationalization of GOP politics." Boebert will face Democrat Trisha Calvarese in November; in the reddest district in Colorado that hasn't elected a Democrat to the House since 2008.