The sound of my children’s laughter feels like agonising torture – I have to wear headphones to drown them out
KAREN Cook used to cherish the sound of her children’s laughter.
Now, it’s unbearable torture.
The 49-year-old has a rare ear condition and shuts herself away from her family as she simply can’t bear their noise.
She even wears headphones to drown out any hint at their existence.
Karen said: “I missed being a mum, a wife and enjoying family life, but I couldn’t take the torture it brought me anymore.”
Working as a former cabin crew member, she often experienced the sensation of pressure in her ears.
But one day, they never “popped” back to normal.
Since then, she’s suffered from a continuous ringing, as well as a constant burning sensation, where the sounds of her family send her into a spiral of anger.
Now, Karen is sharing her harrowing battle to raise awareness of severe pain hyperacusis – where everyday sounds trigger utter agony.
“Each time my kids would laugh or talk, I’d be filled with severe pain,” Karen, from Merseyside, said.
“Life turned into a relentless Groundhog Day. I couldn’t see a way out.
“I felt like I had lost the most important people in my life, as I just couldn’t see them anymore.
“Whenever I was out or sat with my husband, Nick, and my kids, the noise of them having a good time was unbearable.
“I had to shut myself away from them in a different room.”
Karen recalls a persistent fullness in her ears after a long flight, which still wouldn’t budge after a few days.
Soon, whenever there was background noise, such as the wind, music or TV, ringing would occur.
And as it got louder, the pain increased.
“The noise was competing with every other sound,” she said.
“It was barely noticeable in silence, but then it just got worse.
“I took a hearing test, which found nothing, and then the burning sensation started.
“I was told my brain would eventually adjust and my family even believed it was all psychological.
“But I felt like I was being gaslit, as I knew there was something much worse going on.”
I’ve stopped going out and have become a shell of myself
Karen Cook
Karen’s situation deteriorated rapidly, to the point that she ended up being housebound for a year and had to quit her career.
She tried various pain medications, as well as holistic therapies, but nothing seemed to work.
All communication was reduced to whispers and written notes, until she finally received her diagnosis in February 2022.
It’s believed that it may have stemmed from a childhood ear infection, but the exact cause remains unknown.
What is hyperacusis?
Hyperacusis is when everyday sounds seem much louder than they should.
This can be everything from a barking dog to a vacuum cleaner, and can be incredibly painful for some people.
This sensitivity to noise can affect relationships, school, work and a sufferer’s overall wellbeing.
Treatment plans vary. If it is caused by another condition, such as migraines, Lyme disease or autism, then treating these may stop hyperacusis.
However, when there is no clear cause, patients can be offered sound therapy and cognitive behavioural therapy.
Relaxation techniques, like breathing exercises, can also help.
The NHS advises against using earplugs or earmuffs to drown sounds out, and does not recommend avoiding noisy situations as this can make you even more sensitive to noise.
Source: NHS
Most days, she sits on her own wearing headphones in a bid to drown out any sounds around her.
Even the wind rustling leaves in trees or traffic driving past her house is enough to cause Karen immense pain.
Her symptoms are so severe that on Christmas Day, she had to sit in another room and watch through the window while her boys excitedly unwrapped their presents.
It’s like somebody poured burning lava into my ears and my head burns, especially behind my eyes
Karen Cook
Karen told the BBC earlier this year: “Something as beautiful as my children’s laughter is like torture for me.
“It’s like somebody poured burning lava into my ears and my head burns, pain all over my head, especially behind my eyes.
“It’s like a migraine kind of pain – it’s like you want to split your head open to relieve the pressure.
“I miss being a mum, I miss the clatter of the noise when they come in from school.
“My house is a prison. Sound keeps me prisoner.”
But Karen clings on to hope that one day a breakthrough might help get her life back.
SEARCHING FOR A MIRACLE
“I want to find a miracle that can get me back to my two boys and enable me to see them grow up,” she said.
“I also want people suffering like me to not be gaslit by medical professionals or family members who think it’s all in your head.
“We’re led to believe that the worst that can happen is we would lose some hearing or become deaf – but tinnitus and hyperacusis are both completely disabling at this level.
“I’m truly horrified at the complete lack of education around safe listening levels and sounds, too.
“I’ve stopped going out and have become a shell of myself, but I’m determined not to give up.
“If I fail to recover, I want everyone to know that I tried everything possible.
“I hope someone reads this and can help me get back to a normal life with my family again.”