Watch the Opening Credits of an Imaginary 70s Cop Show Starring Samuel Beckett

Samuel Beckett: avant-garde dramatist, brooding Nobel Prize winner, poet, and…gritty television detective?

Sadly, no, but he had the makings of a great one, at least as cut together by playwright Danny Thompson, cofounder of Chicago’s Theater Oobleck.

Some 35 years after Beckett’s death, Thompson—whose credits include the Complete Lost Works of Samuel Beckett as Found in a Dustbin in Paris in an Envelope (Partially Burned) Labeled: Never to Be Performed. Never. Ever. Ever! Or I’ll Sue! I’ll Sue From the Grave!!!-–repurposed Rosa Veim and Daniel Schmid’s footage of the moody genius wandering around 1969 Berlin into the opening credits of a nonexistent, 70s era Quinn Martin police procedural.

The title sequence hits all the right period notes, from the jazzy graphics to the presentation of its supporting cast: Andre the Giant, Jean-Paul Sartre, and Jean “Huggy Bear” Cocteau. (Did you know that Beckett drove a young Andre the Giant to school in real life?)

Thompson ups the verisimilitude by copping Pat Williams’ theme for The Streets of San Francisco and naming the imaginary pilot episode after a collection of Beckett’s short stories.

He also jokingly notes that a DVD release of the first, only and, again, entirely non-existent season has been held up by the Beckett estate. Alas.

Related Content:

Watch Samuel Beckett Walk the Streets of Berlin Like a Boss, 1969

The Books That Samuel Beckett Read and Really Liked (1941–1956)

Hear Samuel Beckett’s Avant-Garde Radio Plays: All That Fall, Embers, and More

An Animated Introduction to Samuel Beckett, Absurdist Playwright, Novelist & Poet

When Samuel Beckett Drove Young André the Giant to School: A True Story

Ayun Halliday is an author, illustrator, and Chief Primatologist of the East Village Inky zine. Follow her @AyunHalliday