I suspected my man was cheating with my sister-in-law for YEARS but never had proof – until his phone bill gave it away
A WOMAN has revealed that her husband has been cheating on her with her sister-in-law.
She claimed that she had her suspicions for years but never had proof, until a phone bill gave it away.
Clearly shocked at her husband’s infidelity, the anonymous woman took to social media to open up on the situation, leaving many open-mouthed.
Posting on Reddit, on the r/survivinginfidelity thread under the username @Sweetie0191, the woman titled her post ‘Husband cheated with sister-in-law’.
Keen to receive support, the woman wrote: “I just found out last week that my husband and sister-in-law have been having an affair.
“I’ve suspected it for many years but have never had any concrete proof.”
Providing the backstory of the situation, the woman confessed: “My husband and I have been together for 11 years and my brother and his wife have been together for almost the same amount of time as well.
“My husband admitted that he and my sister-in-law would have conversations over the years without anyone knowing (we all used to live together several years ago).
“I’ve watched them over the years flirting, being playful, and just very overly friendly.
“I thought I was being jealous and ultimately I told myself I should just trust him.
“Everyone in my family can see that my sister-in-law had a “thing” for my husband because of the way she would act towards him.
“She confided in him about her marriage to my brother a lot, telling him how they’re on the brink of divorce or how mentally abusive he is, etc.”
But things all changed in August 2018, after the woman lost her second child at 23 weeks pregnant.
The mum-of-one confessed: “It was devastating; I was heartbroken. Then, I started working back in February of 2019 and I asked my sister-in-law to watch our son.
“I later learned that that’s when things turned physical in their relationship.
He denied it for many years and he told me I was “crazy” but my intuition kept nagging at me
Reddit poster
“He tells me it went on from February of 2019 to September of 2019 (we put our son in daycare September of 2019) which is why I think their interactions weren’t as frequent after this point.
“Also, to be clear, I’ve asked him outright more times than I can count if there was anything going on between the two of them and he said no.
“He denied it for many years and he told me I was “crazy” but my intuition kept nagging at me.”
The savvy mother confessed that it was a phone bill that brought the secret to light, as she added: “Now fast forward to a couple weeks ago – I kept thinking about it and I decided to check our phone bill.
“I saw that they texted on a Saturday morning at 5am back in the middle of September and then again around noon that very same day.
“I tried to rationalise why they would be texting and I couldn’t. We had no plans of meeting up with them that day or anything.”
Four red flags your partner is cheating
Private Investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs your partner might be cheating.
They start to take their phone everywhere with them
In close relationships, it’s normal to know each other’s passwords and use each other’s phones, if their phone habits change then they may be hiding something.
Aaron says: “If your partner starts changing their passwords, starts taking their phone everywhere with them, even around the house or they become defensive when you ask to use their phone it could be a sign of them not being faithful.”
“You should also look at how they place their phone down when not in use. If they face the phone with the screen facing down, then they could be hiding something.”
They start telling you less about their day
When partners cheat they can start to avoid you, this could be down to them feeling guilty or because it makes it easier for them to lie to you.
“If you feel like your partner has suddenly begun to avoid you and they don’t want to do things with you any more or they stop telling you about their day then this is another red flag.”
“Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be tough, remembering all of your lies is impossible and it’s an easy way to get caught out,” says Aaron.
Their libido changes
Your partner’s libido can change for a range of reasons so it may not be a sure sign of cheating but it can be a red flag according to Aaron.
Aaron says: “Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but on occasions, they may also have more sex at home, this is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will start to introduce new things into your sex life that weren’t there before.”
They become negative towards you
Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and to them, it will feel good, this can cause tension and anxiety within themselves which they will need to justify.
“To get rid of the tension they feel inside they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and they will become critical of you out of nowhere. Maybe you haven’t walked the dog that day, put the dishes away or read a book to your children before bedtime. A small problem like this can now feel like a big deal and if you experience this your partner could be cheating,” warns Aaron.
She explained that she left work, went home, and confronted him, to which he admitted that the sister-in-law “touched him inappropriately”.
After his admission, the woman then confronted her sister-in-law, to which she said it was the woman’s husband that had “touched her inappropriately.”
The woman continued: “I went home and asked him and he said ‘yes, it’s all true’.
“She ended up telling my brother the next day and he called me. We talked and I told him what I always suspected and that I think they’re both at fault.
“He went home and spoke with her and she turned it around saying that my husband assaulted her and that she’s the victim.
“My brother is now saying I have something against his wife and is telling me I’m victim blaming her and that I’m married to some monster.”
One of his excuses was that we weren’t having sex enough, even though we had just lost our child six months before
Reddit poster
Clearly fed up, the woman wrote: “I’m so sick over this and haven’t been getting much sleep at all. I really need support and any helpful advice.
“He’s open to counselling (I myself have seen a therapist for many years) but I’m just heartbroken at this point and feel betrayed.
“On a side note when I asked him why he did what he did one of his excuses was that we weren’t having sex enough, even though we had just lost our child six months before things turned physical between the two of them.”
Reddit users react
Reddit users were left gobsmacked by the woman’s unique situation and many flocked to the comments to share their advice and guidance.
It’s time for the four of you to sit down with any proof you have and clear the air
Reddit user
One person recommended: “Ugh. Sounds like you may be losing both your husband and brother. What a traumatic event.
“Seek out a therapist to unpack all of this. This is a lot of trauma for you to handle and you can’t even lean on those you are close to.”
Another advised: “It’s time for the four of you to sit down with any proof you have and clear the air.
“Your brother will be your family for the rest of your life. Are you willing to jeopardise that relationship for two lying cheating spouses?”
Meanwhile, a third commented: “There is nothing on earth that can fix it..only distance and time…
“These types of “people” are f*****g monsters.”