The Conservative Gentleman: Let Him Return

While in college, I was Chair of the Liberal Party of the Yale Political Union, a debating society of sorts. It hosted famous guests who debated with students in front of an audience of many other students and sometimes C-SPAN. One of the perks of being a Party Chair was eating dinner with the guest before the evening’s debate.

That year, 1993 or 1994, Gov. John Sununu was our guest. I attended the dinner with an agenda: I had a mad crush Sununu’s co-host on the CNN show Crossfire: Michael Kinsley. I’d written a fan letter to Kinsley and planned to ask Sununu to deliver it. The former Governor was delightful at dinner, a perfect gentlemen. That was in contrast to a few other guests, one of whom got incredibly drunk at dinner and returned from the men’s room and informed us that he had taken a “presidential piss.”

Toward the end of dinner, I asked Sununu if he’d deliver my note to Kinsley. He said he’d be happy to. A few weeks later I got a Crossfire postcard with a handwritten note from Kinsley. I almost fainted. Sununu was true to his word, even in the matter of delivering a 19-year-old’s mash note to a television commentator.

Those days are gone. Just after this year’s election, a friend who voted for Trump said, “He’s not a gentleman, he doesn't act like a world leader, but I voted for him because of his policies.” I think a lot of people feel that way. We long for the return of the conservative gentleman, one who’s respectful of his adversaries, dignified in his speeches, and kind to college students on the opposite political side.

The Yale Political Union in 1992-1996 was a breeding ground for gentlemen and ladies, conservative and liberal. We dressed up for debates, argued our cases with evidence instead of insults, and then went out for pizza together. Even though it was somewhat scandalous when I, as Liberal Party Chair, dated a prominent member of the Party of the Right, no one “cancelled” me. Back then cancelling meant informing someone that you were unable to make an appointment, not ruining their lives.

My friends say their college student children live in a different world. Some are afraid to speak up for fear of saying the wrong thing. My Jewish friends’ children are harassed and even threatened on a daily basis by kids who’ve gone crazy for a cause they can’t even explain. Some of my friends’ children have joined the pro-Hamas protests, much to their parents’ horror. In our day, if we protested it was peaceful. The adults wouldn’t have allowed us to take over campus.

A man of my acquaintance, a Millennial in his early-30s, is a gentleman. He stands by his word, family, and country. I hope he’s not the only one.

Considering the broad victory that Trump, not a gentleman, just won, imagine what would happen if the Republicans fielded someone you’d be proud to see on the world stage. While a few liberals have embarrassed themselves and their party with performative meltdowns on social media, the majority doesn’t want to see people screaming, crying, emoting or cackling. They want leaders who’re calm in a time of crisis and who know how to show respect to the leaders of our allied nations, instead of snubbing the leader of our strongest ally in time of war the way Vice President Harris did when she skipped out on Prime Minister Netanyahu’s speech before Congress. Voters would be pleased to support a leader who opens doors for ladies.