What every manager should know about ADHD

If you ask a doctor about ADHD, they will tell you that it’s a developmental disorder characterized by traits of forgetfulness, impulsivity, and disorganization. However, there are so many great qualities associated with ADHD that don’t get discussed, just some of which include creativity, resilience, problem-solving, and hyper focus.

Neurodivergent people are the world’s best problem-solvers. We have had to practice it for our entire lives. From a very young age we have had to find unique solutions to really difficult problems because we are intrinsically a little bit different.

We are also great at reading other people. We can hyper focus on people’s micro communications, pick up on tiny fluctuations in tone of voice, and little changes in facial expressions that neurotypical people miss. We can recognize patterns in people’s mannerisms, which enables us to judge someone’s character extremely effectively.

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria

People with ADHD people are criticised around 20,000 more times than your average child. We have heard things like, “why are you being lazy,” “stop fidgeting,” and “be normal.” This means that as adults we are often more sensitive to rejection, and might experience something called Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, which causes intense pain triggered by real or perceived rejection.

For example, if you don’t explicitly invite an ADHD person to a social event, we will assume you don’t actually want us there. If you say, “come if you want,” we will think that our presence at that social event is a nuisance, and might even think you hate us as well.

Similarly, if you don’t tell someone with ADHD that you explicitly like them, we will assume that you tolerate us. And as a manager, if you ask an ADHD person for a quick chat, we might assume you want a quick chat so you can fire us. Carefully consider your wording and make sure to balance any feedback with positive comments. Be explicit and intentional when sending invitations to work events and briefly explain what any quick chats will cover.

Integrating regular breaks

When RSD hits us, it hits hard. We might need a minute to remove ourselves from any situation, whether that’s going to get some fresh air, or pacing up and down the street for a while. Allowing for breaks and not questioning it will help put space between the stimulus and reaction, allowing our brain time to regulate itself again and not be influenced by intense feelings.

The pause also allows us to practise self-compassion and not react impulsively in the moment. If someone asks for a minute, it might be the break they need to return back fully focussed.

Burnout and vulnerability

It’s common for ADHD employees to overwork, stay up late into the night, and push ourselves to the limit. They have spent their whole lives feeling as if they’re not good enough, so it’s no surprise they might feel like they have something to prove.

The early warning signs are unique to all of us and we all need to be aware of our own, but it’s sometimes possible to spot it in other people as well. Some of these early signs might include: becoming easily agitated, forgetting things that would usually be remembered, becoming less patient, and neglecting self-care.

One way leaders can help is by creating culture of psychological safety, where your employees feel able to speak out if they are struggling. If your culture is about purely celebrating wins then you are not really creating an environment where other people feel safe to ask for help if they need it.

It’s important to set the tone from above that it’s okay to be vulnerable and speak out about anything that might be causing stress—whether it’s social interactions, difficulties with tasks, or deadline difficulties.

Remember that everyone is unique

Many leaders think that a blanket accommodations policy will be beneficial to everyone. You often see companies say that they will integrate movement breaks, adopt flexible working, and normalize fidget toys and noise-cancelling headphones.

These are great, but leaders need to recognize that everyone has a brain as unique as their fingerprint, and everyone’s needs will be different. It’s more important to create a culture of psychological safety, where people feel empowered to speak up and ask for the specific support they need to perform their job well.