Here's what to do if your boss asks you out on a date

Universal Television

Romance is in the air this time of year — which can drive people to think with their heart instead of their head.

So if your boss, who has been admiring you for a while, finally decides to make a move, you'll want to be prepared.

"Although office romances do sometimes leads to a long term relationship and even marriage, as a general rule it's never a good idea to date the boss," says Michael Kerr, an international business speaker and author of "The Humor Advantage." "There are so many pitfalls to dating the boss, including jealousy and perceived favoritism from colleagues, potential ethical violations, and the unintended and negative consequences that might happen if the relationship heads south."

According to a Vault survey, 16% of those who have had a romance at work have dated a supervisor — but most of those relationships don't work out. Another study from CareerBuilder found that only a third of office romances end in marriage.

So, here's what to do if your manager asks you out:

Get clarity.

"First, clarify if it is strictly platonic or not," says Kerr. "It may simply be a one off gesture of friendship. For example, maybe someone has canceled at the last minute and the boss has an extra ticket to a concert or sporting event and thought it would something you'd enjoy."

Even in such a scenario, though, recognize that this could be easy fodder for the gossip mongers. You need to consider appearances and how comfortable you'd be if word spread around your office that you attended a personal function with your boss.  

Think about how you feel.

Consider your own feelings. Are you even remotely interested? Are you attracted to them? Can you see things working out?

You wouldn't want to put your reputation and career on the line unless you're really into your boss and feel certain it's a good idea to strike up an office romance.

Weigh the pros and cons.

If you're even remotely interested, you'll need to seriously consider all the potential downsides of going out with your boss, including how okay you are with how other colleagues might react and treat you, Kerr says.

"Will you be comfortable with the potential gossip that might arise? Do you feel both parties will be able to keep it strictly professional and not let it affect your work? How will both parties deal with it if it doesn't work out? You need to have a completely open and frank discussion with your boss in a neutral setting to make sure all of your concerns are heard and acknowledged," he explains.