Uh…spoiler alert.

If you've already read the new Harry Potter book — which isn't a book but a script — then continue reading. If you haven't, then this post will be a spoiler and also mostly about Voldemort's dick, just FYI.

google.com

You see, in The Cursed Child, an evil and angsty millennial named Delphi is revealed to be the daughter of Bellatrix Lestrange and...VOLDEMORT.

Warner Bros. / Via cinemablend.com

This is upsetting for reasons including the fact that oh, Voldemort can find a girlfriend but I'm still single? And also, WAIT, VOLDEMORT HAS A PENIS?????

thedarklxrd.tumblr.com

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