Marriage counselor says couples are struggling during “stay at home” order

TOPEKA, Kan. (KSNT) – Governor Laura Kelly’s “stay at home” order is nearly one month old and a local expert said couples are feeling the stress.

Angela McClain is a licensed clinical professional counselor (LCPC) located in Topeka. She said, in couples who are experiencing issues, there is generally one partner that wants to runaway from the problems; however, during a pandemic, that’s nearly impossible.

“Where are they going to go?” McClain said. “Basically they don’t have the avoidance tactic that they normally have, so they are stuck with either having to deal with it or just disconnect.”

However, McClain said giving your partner personal space is healthy. She suggests couples communicate openly with their partner about their needs and try to take some time to themselves regularly.

McClain said she is still seeing the majority of her patients in person during the pandemic. She has added teletherapy services, but a good amount of people have decided to forgo counseling until the pandemic is over.

When the ‘stay at home” order went in to place back in March, McClain said many of her clients were happy for the time off to work on projects, one even built a new deck. However, as the order has been extended, many of them are now ready for it to be over.

“They really want to go back to the way it was where they each had their separate jobs, their separate time and the kids were in school,” McClain said.

McClain said for many families, however, things will never be the same. There are couples that have decided to divorce once the “stay at home” orders are lifted, and while these couples want to blame coronavirus, McClain said these relationships were strained before the pandemic started.