Maybe Matt Lauer was ‘a far bigger monster’ than many realized: Outrage follows rape claims, Lauer’s response

After “Today” host Matt Lauer was accused of sexually inappropriate behavior and fired from his job at NBC, the once popular and powerful TV personality issued two brief statements, saying he otherwise wanted to keep silent to avoid more negative headlines his children would read.

Lauer, 61, acknowledged sexual contacts with female colleagues, but characterized them as “consensual” affairs by saying he never forced anyone to have sex with him and by acknowledging he hadn’t been the best husband, father or network colleague.

But revelations in Ronan Farrow’s new book, “Catch and Kill,” which includes Brooke Nevils’ bombshell allegation that Lauer anally raped her, are challenging the embattled star’s prime defense: That he never assaulted, forced or coerced anyone into being intimate with him.

Lauer’s further attempt this week to explain himself does not appear to be winning many to his point of view. He issued a detailed, 1400-word open letter, in which he said Nevils “was a fully enthusiastic and wiling partner” in their affair.

But Nevils’ allegation and Lauer’s response — accusing her of falsifying the rape allegations to promote a book deal — have invited an onslaught of shock and outrage from friends and former colleagues.

NBC News called Lauer’s conduct “appalling, horrific and reprehensible,” while former “Today” colleague Hoda Kotb said Nevils is claiming there was “a crime.” Lauer’s response also prompted other former NBC colleagues to detail more examples of his alleged predatory workplace behavior.

Even Lauer’s ex-wife Annette Roque, who has apparently tried to maintain an amicable co-parenting relationship with him, declined to come to his defense. Through her lawyers, she said her “only concern is for their wonderful children,” People reported. 

Nevils, who told Farrow that Lauer raped her in a hotel while they both were covering the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi, Russia, said the disgraced anchor’s response was “a case study in victim shaming,” People reported. 

Addie Collins Zinone, a former “Today” staffer who accused Lauer of “abuse of power” in their consensual affair in the early 2000s, said Lauer’s letter displayed a lack of contrition and “a threatening tone in an attempt to manipulate and control the narrative for his gain,” the Daily Beast reported. 

Another former “Today” colleague told People it was well known that Lauer engaged in inappropriate relationships with junior staffers — and punished those who rejected his advances.

“I wish I could say any of it surprised me, but it doesn’t,” the colleague said. “I guess I’m a little surprised that he still doesn’t get it, that he still thinks it was OK to have ‘affairs’ with co-workers who absolutely had every reason to feel nervous if they didn’t find his attentions flattering.”

“If you didn’t find his … behavior charming … then you put a target on your back,” the colleague said.

Another person, “a former member of Lauer’s inner circle,” told People that many who care for him are more than “disappointed” by his response.

“A lot of people, who certainly had some sympathy for him and still hoped for the best for him, are now just completely appalled by not only what is being alleged but also, maybe even more so, by the way he chose to respond to it,” the former friend said. “He just doesn’t get that the power differential was so totally skewed in his favor that he had no business going anywhere near those women.”

The former friend said that many thought it was good that Lauer retreated to his estate in the Hamptons after he was fired in November 2017 and kept a low-profile. Lauer himself said that he wanted to “stay quiet and work on repairing my relationship with the people I love.”

Many friends thought that he used the time to reflect and come to terms with his actions, the source told People. Instead, “it’s like he’s fully showing his true colors now,” the person said. His response has led people to think “maybe he’s actually a far bigger monster than they ever realized.”

Earlier this week, Variety obtained an advance copy of “Catch and Kill,” and reported on what Farrow had uncovered about allegations against Lauer and about how NBC responded.

Nevils is the same woman whose complaint against Lauer led to his firing, according to Variety. Nevils told Farrow she was assigned to work in Sochi with former “Today” co-anchor Meredith Vieira, who had been brought back to the show to do Olympics coverage.

Nevils explained that the attack happened after a night of drinking at a hotel bar. In Lauer’s hotel room, she said the “Today” host, wearing a T-shirt and boxers, pushed her against the door and kissed her.

Lauer then pushed her onto the bed, “flipping her over, asking if she liked anal sex,” Farrow wrote, according to Variety. Nevills said she was trying to tell Lauer she didn’t want anal sex, when he “just did it.”

Farrow reported that the encounter was excruciatingly painful. “It hurt so bad,” she said. “I remember thinking, Is this normal?” Nevill told Farrow she wept silently into the pillow, while Lauer asked her if she liked it.

Nevils told Farrow: “It was nonconsensual in the sense that I was too drunk to consent. It was nonconsensual in that I said, multiple times, that I didn’t want to have anal sex.”

Nevils told Farrow she was afraid Lauer would end her career, so she continued to have “transactional” sexual encounters with him. Lauer, in his open letter, insisted that all their sexual contacts were consensual.

“At no time, during or after her multiple visits to my apartment, did she express in words or actions any discomfort with being there, or with our affair,” Lauer wrote. He suggested Nevils was upset he ended the affair “poorly.”

“However, being upset or having second thoughts does not give anyone the right to make false accusations years later about an affair in which they fully and willingly participated,” Lauer said.

Lauer also denounced the other women with whom he said he had “extramarital relationships.”

“For two years, the women with whom I had extramarital relationships have abandoned shared responsibility, and instead, shielded themselves from blame behind false allegations,” he wrote. “They have done enormous damage in the process.”

Lawyer and author Jill Filipovic wrote in an NBC News commentary that these justifications from Lauer show the extent to which he and his attorneys have missed the “biggest lessons” of the #MeToo movement — in particular the lessons about workplace power dynamics, sex and consent.

Lauer wrote that he saw no abuse of power with Nevils because he didn’t supervise her.

But Filipovic wrote that as anchor of “Today,” Lauer was one of the most important people at NBC, wielding incredible power at both the network and in the journalism industry more generally.

“Nevils certainly knew that Lauer could open doors for her if he chose — and that he could slam them shut. He was more than capable of tarnishing her reputation, making life more difficult for her at their mutual company, or even trying to blacklist her,” Fillopic wrote.

“Instead of grappling with that reality, Lauer paints himself as the real victim here,” Filipovic said.

Another of Lauer’s former colleagues certainly doesn’t see him as a victim. Ann Curry, whose differences with Lauer reportedly led to her losing her job at “Today,” said Nevils came to NBC as “an eager and guileless 20-something, brimming with talent.”

Curry said “I believe she is telling the truth. And that breaks my heart.”

Brooke Nevils is a credible young woman of good character. She came to NBC News an eager and guileless 20-something, brimming with talent.

I believe she is telling the truth. And that breaks my heart. https://t.co/k4LT3MEh5Q

— Ann Curry (@AnnCurry) October 9, 2019