Son helps dad see self-reliance does not end when driving stops: Roadshow
Plus, soliciting reader ideas for getting around after giving up keys.
Q: When in his early 80s, my dad drove us to shoot pool at his local senior center during one of my visits. He had always been an excellent driver, but I was horrified and scared that day.
After we made it back to his house, I called my two siblings about this. Both had recently had the same experience. Later that night, I told Pops about our concerns, and a few unsettling things I noticed as he drove. He thanked me and said he’d consider it.
A few weeks later, he asked my sibs and me to send him a letter about our concerns. We immediately did and he then handed over his keys to our mom.
In an attempt to help him with his new non-driving status, I visited again for a few days and we explored the local bus system together (pre-Uber/Lyft), and transportation services provided through the senior center. We shopped, mailed some packages, and shot more pool. Once he realized he could still get around, and still play with his pals, he was a happy man, and we were relieved siblings.
Sky Wallace, Pioneer
A: You did him, and all, a great favor.
Q: Your columns on how to incentivize people to stop driving are interesting. I think most reluctance is due to the cold reality that a car is required for self-sufficiency. (This applies to anyone wishing to give up reliance on their own automobile.)
It would be a great service to your readers to ask for and then publish non-mass-transit alternatives that some have used (and please, no debates about bicycles, which is something different). I’m sure many people would be more willing to stop driving if they knew they could maintain self-sufficiency without a car. It would help us all.
Sheri Gish
A: Great idea. What suggestions do you have, readers, for non-mass-transit alternatives?
Q: I suggest that each year you repeat columns about older drivers giving up driving. It would be a saluted public service.
Although I passed my recent driving test, I was not as relaxed behind the wheel as I had been for years.
Now I am comfortably pledged to ask favors of neighbors and Silicon Valley relatives/pals, such as, “IF/when you next head to a grocery store and have time for a few extra items, please do check with me, as a giant favor to the ‘Aged Wonder.'” I rarely need more than three items.
I’m jubilantly a remarkably healthy and active 92-year-old who is currently being oriented/trained on — ready? — Zoom!
Vilma Kennedy Pallette
A: Thank you for your suggestion, your comfort with asking for help, as needed, and your jubilant spirit.
Look for Gary Richards at facebook.com/mr.roadshow or contact him at mrroadshow@bayareanewsgroup.com.