Reese Witherspoon’s Message to Girl Dads Everywhere: “You Write on Their Mind With a Sharpie” ????
When Reese Witherspoon made an appearance on podcast Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard, the conversation covered everything from career longevity to empowerment, but one moment stuck out to us, parents: her message to girl-dads.
“I think this is important,” Witherspoon, who has one daughter and two sons, told Shepard. “It’s so important what you say to your daughters. You write on their mind with a Sharpie. It’s not a dry erase board.”
The Oscar winner went on to explain how much a father’s words and actions shape a daughter’s sense of self-worth and even the kinds of relationships she’ll seek later in life. “The tools of self-confidence, self-worth, what they’re looking for in a partner—you get a lot of that from your dad,” she said.
Shepard, a father of two girls he had with actress Kristen Bell, responded that his own parenting mantra is simple: “They’re going to date me. So what am I going to be that they go out and try to find?” For him, that means being fully present, dropping everything to listen to them, and showing his daughters what respect and attention should look like.
Witherspoon praised that mindset. “I like that you’re emotionally vulnerable,” she told Shepard. “Parents who don’t pretend to be perfect… who say, ‘I’ve messed up, but I’m consistent’—that’s what kids need. Somebody who cherishes you, loves you, doesn’t harm you.”
What the Research Says
Science backs up what Witherspoon was getting at. A 2022 study published in Frontiers in Psychology found that strong father-daughter relationships are linked to higher levels of self-esteem and emotional resilience in girls. Another study in the Psychology Research and Behavior Management showed that girls who feel securely connected to their fathers tend to experience lower rates of depression and anxiety as teens and young adults.
Still, it’s worth noting that healthy attachment and modeling aren’t exclusive to dads. Families come in many forms—two moms, single parents, grandparents, or other caregivers—and what truly matters is that a child has consistent, caring adults who show up emotionally and make them feel seen and valued.
Regardless, Witherspoon’s words struck a chord because they speak to something universal: kids remember how the adults closest to them make them feel. Whether you’re a dad, mom, step-parent, or guardian, the message is the same: what you say (and how you show up) doesn’t wash off easily. It leaves a mark, hopefully one written in love and confidence that lasts a lifetime.