Ever since I moved in with my brother he treats me like his live in maid

DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my brother took me in after a very abrupt break-up, I was so grateful – but six months later I may as well be his maid.

I know I need to put my foot down but I’m worried it’ll cause an argument.

I’m a 36-year-old woman and my brother is 40. 

When my boyfriend dumped me out of the blue, I thought my brother was being kind, insisting that I moved in with him until I got myself back on my feet. 

I didn’t give it a second thought when I agreed. We’d always had a good relationship and it was very rare, even growing up, that we ever argued. 

Yet since I moved in, it has been a nightmare.  I expected to have to do my share of chores, but it seems my brother thinks I should do everything. 

And I mean everything – the cooking, cleaning, washing, ironing and even food shopping. 

He’s even started leaving his dirty clothes on the floor in the expectation I will pick them up.

He says that because he’s doing me a favour by letting me stay in his house, I should be the one that has to do the chores. 

Sometimes I even hear him on the phone complaining that I’m being lazy when I have a lie-in on the weekends.

I know I shouldn’t put up with it, but I hate conflict.

DEIDRE SAYS: Your brother is being so unfair and inconsiderate.

While it’s normal that he expects you to contribute, he is wrong to demand that it’s all your responsibility.

The only way things will improve is if you talk to him. Explain how you feel and try to set some boundaries.

My support pack Standing Up For Yourself explains the techniques to use which won’t cause an argument

If nothing improves then perhaps it is time you moved out.