My wife has been avoiding sex for the past 30 years of our marriage
DEAR DEIDRE: I HAVEN’T been intimate with my wife in more than 30 years but my sex drive is as high as it’s ever been.
All I want is to feel close to her again, but she never seems to be interested.
We’ve been together for 41 years. I am 67, she is 65.
Our sex life used to be pretty solid until one day she announced that she was finished with intimacy.
She never gave any real reason for it, but since that day she has done everything in her power to avoid getting close to me.
While I still have so much love for her, I constantly struggle with feelings of rejection and frustration.
I’ve started to consider investing in a sex doll. I thought perhaps this would fill the void in my life but when I mentioned this to my wife she looked at me with disgust and gave me a flat “No”.
I’m at a loss. All I want is to feel some kind of satisfaction again, but it seems impossible.
Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team
Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.
Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
DEIDRE SAYS: I’m sorry to hear that you have had such a tough time. It is never too late for positive changes in a relationship.
A healthy sex life has huge mental health benefits so it’s understandable that this has been getting you down.
Find the courage to explain to your wife how you’ve been feeling. Read my support pack Different Sex Drives to help.
You may also benefit from some sex and relationship counselling. Contact College of Sexual and Relationship Therapists (cosrt.org.uk), who can put you in touch with a reputable therapist.