My boyfriend’s small penis is ruining our relationship

DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my new boyfriend warned me that he isn’t very big in the trouser department, I pretended I was OK with it. 

But the truth is, I’m worried I won’t be able to feel anything when we have sex and that this will ruin our relationship.

I’m 44 and he’s 46. We’re both divorced and we met on a dating site. 

We’ve been talking every night for months and have really fallen for each other. He’s kind, funny and caring – everything I’ve been looking for in a guy.

For many weeks, I’ve been suggesting that we meet in person so we can take our relationship to another level. But he kept making excuses.

It made me paranoid and I started not to trust him.

One night, I got really upset and he admitted the real reason he’s been avoiding getting together – he has a very small penis and he’s worried he won’t be able to satisfy me. 

He also said his ex-wife was very mean about it during his divorce and it has given him a complex. I told him not to be silly, that it’s him I want, not just his penis. 

However, like most women, I do like making love with a well-endowed man.

If we have sex and it is as tiny as he says, it’ll be a massive turn-off. 
We’ve arranged to meet next weekend. What should I do? I don’t want to hurt him.

If I cancel, he’ll know it’s because of what he’s told me. But it will be even worse if we end up in the bedroom and it’s an awful experience.

DEIDRE SAYS: There’s much more to sex than the size of a man’s penis. If you have chemistry and are attracted to each other, you’ll still have fun in bed.

Even if his penis is smaller than average (and your boyfriend may be exaggerating because of his complex), a woman’s vagina is designed to fit any size penis, whether large or tiny.

Most women don’t orgasm from penetrative sex as it is. So he should be able to satisfy you with his hands or by giving you oral pleasure instead.

My support pack, Penis Size, should help reassure you.