I have a major crush on dad’s girlfriend who he doesn’t treat right

DEAR DEIDRE: I’VE had a lifelong crush on my dad’s on-off girlfriend and it’s frying my brain.

She is 43 now and I’m 29. She came into our lives when I was 14.

She was fun and mischievous so me and my younger brother liked her from the start.

We really hoped that Dad, 54, would settle down with his girlfriend.

He and mum had been divorced ever since I could remember and he was a real player – always bringing different women back to our home.

Sadly, he messed around behind his girlfriend’s back and so she dumped him.

I was delighted when he patched things up with her.

Unfortunately, it didn’t last long and they fell into a pattern of constantly breaking up and getting back together again.

All the while my feelings grew for her, but, of course, I couldn’t say anything.

Even though she is nearly 15 years older than me, she’s a really good-looking woman who really takes care of herself.

I’ve spent years fantasising that one day she will come to her senses and see that I’m a far better match than Dad.

It makes me mad how he has taken her for granted and continually cheats behind her back. She deserves so much more.

Her and Dad are on one of their breaks at the moment but I keep bumping into her near my work.

I think she may even be flirting with me. Last time we spoke we gave each other a hug and I told her I wished Dad would sort himself out.

She gave me a long look, a peck on the lips and called me the sweetest man she’s ever met.

Do I stand a chance? Should I risk telling her how I feel?

DEIDRE SAYS: In short, no. Even if she is flirting with you and has romantic designs on you please stop and think about your father.

If you were to get involved with her, you would be seriously risking your relationship with your dad.

I understand why you find it frustrating to see the way he treats her, but that wouldn’t justify going behind his back.

Also please stop and consider for a moment why she has suddenly started appearing near your work and is being more flirty.

Could she be trying to make your dad jealous?

Get on with your own social life so that you can meet someone who won’t trigger a huge family fallout.