My brother is demanding I apologize for the outfit I wore to his wedding – now he wants me to pay for the bride’s dress
AN unapologetic woman has been left in shock after her brother demanded that she pay for his wife’s wedding dress.
She explained that her brother made the suggestion as a way of redeeming herself after wearing an outfit that went against the couple’s dress code for wedding guests.
She penned a lengthy post on Reddit revealing that she doesn’t have a close relationship with her brother or his wife as they don’t live near each other.
The woman said they didn’t have any “bad blood” and despite not being in the bridal party she flew in two weeks prior to the wedding.
She wrote: “The dress code was ‘fancy.’ It didn’t say much more.
“The only thing it said was no indigo blue dresses or white dresses as well as no velvet red suits as those were the colors of the wedding party.
“I hate dresses. I have not worn one since I was 13.
“For fancy wear, I only wear suits, pantsuits, one piece, etc. For my own wedding, I wore a very nice white pantsuit.
“For this occasion, I chose a normal black suit, vest, and suit jacket.
“White blouse, black heels, slick hair, some toned down makeup. No tie but a nice necklace.
“I looked good but in no way bridal or upstage-y. And to be honest, most men had the same outfit on.
“Which is why it never crossed my mind that I was doing something wrong.”
The woman thought that her simple black suit and white blouse with heels didn’t stand out from what everyone else was wearing.
She explained that everything seemed to be going well until members of the bridal party kept bumping into her after they had eaten.
She continued: “But s**t hit the fan when I took off my vest because I had spilled something on it.
“Then the bride’s family and friends started to be more hostile with me.
“Culminating in the bridesmaid dumping red wine on me.
“I was mad, but I pretended like it was a genuine mistake and didn’t say anything.
“Since then, my brother has called me three times.
“Once to tell me that I really f***ed up his wedding.
“The second to demand that I apologize.
“And the third (which was like four minutes later, not even leaving me time to write to his wife) telling me I am dead to him until I make this up to him.
“My husband and mother are bewildered by this.
“My father said I should have had more foresight seeing as I am a woman and wore white to a wedding.”
The woman added: “I just got an email from my brother, telling me that if I wanted to redeem myself, I could reimburse his wife the cost of the dress.
“Now I’m not a detective but this smells like…..bs [bulls**t].”
A flood of commenters argued that the bridal party behaved inappropriately and reassured the woman her outfit couldn’t have ruined her brother’s wedding.
One person wrote: “NTA [not the a**hole]. I too am bewildered.
“It sounds like your outfit was predominantly dark in color and obviously was not a wedding dress or bridal garb in any way.
“The behavior of those who were offended at the wedding is atrocious and disgusting.
“Even if you had indeed made the faux pas they seem to think you did, that would have been ridiculous and inappropriate treatment.
“I’m sorry you were held to that ridiculous standard.”
Another said: “NTA [not the a**hole]. I don’t see how the white blouse of a pantsuit ‘ruined’ his wedding.
“No one thought you were the bride and many men were similarly attired.
“Sometimes people just want to be triggered probably because the post-wedding lull is a bit of a letdown.
“Since you don’t seem to normally have much of a relationship with your brother it’s up to you if you want to be bothered to apologize.
“I would go with something insincere like ‘I’m sorry you found the white shirt of my suit more offensive than the white shirts worn by the men.’”
A third commented: “If anyone deserves an apology, it’s you.
“A white shirt as part of a suit isn’t at all unusual or wrong.
“What I do find wrong are the people who kept bumping into you and then doused you in red wine. Wtf [what the f**k]?
“Bride culture has gotten totally out of hand. No one was screaming about this nonsense in the ‘80s.
“The only thing I remember family mentioning was my aunt wearing a cowboy hat and a halter top to my brother’s wedding.
“LOL [laugh out loud]! That aunt always dressed crazy, so we knew to expect something! NTA [not the a**hole].”
Another added: “By wearing a white blouse to offset the black pantsuit?
“That is perfectly acceptable to wear to a wedding if you ask me.
“You didn’t wear a white dress, it was pants. It sounds to me like they just wanted to start trouble.
“As you aforementioned you aren’t that close to your brother and his bride.
“You also live on opposite sides of the world.
“Your brother saying these harsh words is really disheartening. That is terrible.
“The male guests were wearing white shirts with their suits, no?
“OP [original poster] shouldn’t apologize for anything. If someone needs to apologize; it’s your brother and his wife. NTA [not the a**hole].”