A younger woman saved my life – am I overthinking my next move?
DEAR DEIDRE: I’M having sexual fantasies about the young woman who saved my life during a heart attack.
I’m a married man of 47, my wife is 45 and we have a son of 16. I’ve had treatment for a heart condition in the past, and it’s monitored, but in the hot weather I almost died.
I commute and was standing on a packed train when it stopped in between stations, for what felt like an eternity and I started to feel ill.
The last thing I remember was asking somebody if I could sit, and the next thing I woke up in hospital.
My wife told me a junior doctor had performed CPR on me until the train moved and an ambulance was waiting at the next stop.
My wife was keen to say thanks so a post went out on the social media commuting pages to track down this “angel”, and it was successful.
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I am recovered now, and so a month ago I arranged to meet this doctor and her parents.
My wife and I took them all for dinner. My lifesaver wore a blue, body-hugging dress and flung her arms around me, saying she was delighted to see me with a lot more colour in my cheeks.
Our dinner was lovely and we agreed to keep in touch. But over the past few weeks our chats have definitely become more flirty.
She is 25 and hasn’t got a boyfriend and I know it’s wrong but I’ve asked her to meet me next week for a drink.
I can’t get her pretty face out of my head. I even fantasise about her when I’m having sex with my wife.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: We can all fantasise about other people, even when we are in committed relationships, but acting on it could ruin family life.
This young woman is naturally concerned for your welfare but that doesn’t mean she fancies you.
You’re thinking of her as a potential lover and are looking through rose-tinted glasses.
You’re conveniently ignoring the fact you are married and have a family. You hardly know this young woman and the two of you are at different life stages.
Go and see her, as arranged, but take your wife so that you don’t do anything you regret.
After that, cool it – no more flirting, and focus on your wife.
My support pack Sexual Fantasies will help you to put this friendship into perspective.