No matter how hard I try, I can’t kick my porn habit
DEAR DEIDRE: HOWEVER hard I try, I can’t kick my porn habit.
Watching it makes me feel so dirty and ashamed.
I’ve attempted to quit several times, but something always draws me back in.
I’m a 38-year-old man, with a partner, 35, who doesn’t know about my porn problem.
Like most guys I started watching porn videos when I was young and single. But even when I got with my partner, I couldn’t stop.
If she goes out or is asleep, I watch porn on my tablet or phone. Sometimes, I even do it in bed, under the covers, with the sound off.
The worst thing is that I’ve started to say no to sex with her because normal sex has lost its thrill.
Whenever I try to stop watching, I obsess about it. Eventually, I give in and put on a video.
I hate the man I’ve become, and I desperately want to be free of this addiction. Help.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Online porn is designed to be addictive and watching too much can be desensitising, affecting sex lives.
It’s good that you realise you have a problem.
See my support pack, Internet Pornography Worry?, for help.
Contact thelaurelcentre.co.uk (01926 339594), which offers sex and porn addiction therapy, both online and in person.
Look at pivotalrecovery.org, an online programme that can help you quit.