Chloe Madeley and James Haskell live dangerously with wild sex confessions… but fiery pair thrive in chaos, says expert
JAMES Haskell and Chloe Madeley’s marriage has once again been put under the microscope after he was spotted chatting to a mystery blonde on a night out.
Just a day after the former rugby star, 38, was snapped at Chiltern Firehouse, his wife, 36, was pictured out without her wedding ring – sparking rumours their relationship could be feeling the strain.
The flames were further fuelled by a cryptic post from James later that read “Live a lonely life!”, although sources insist they “really are stronger than ever”.
Indeed, the fiery couple, who married five years ago and have a one-year-old daughter, Bodhi, have weathered a number of storms since getting together in 2015
And TV psychologist Jo Hemmings tells us “big personalities” like Chloe and James can work through most relationship difficulties, so long as communication remains good.
She says: “Fiery-natured people typically have great make-up sex after fiery bust-ups and that is sometimes part and parcel of their relationships.
“Some people hate rows but for others, it’s how they get stuff resolved.
“At the moment it seems Chloe and James stopped working through their issues and need to go back a few steps to how they were when they were processing them.
“That could mean communicating in the form of an argument so long as it clears things up. But they need to be careful not to abandon communication altogether.”
Here, Jo examines the dirty laundry in their marriage – including some extremely frank sex confessions – and how they can overcome any trials and tensions.
Posting ‘a***s on Instagram’
Earlier this month, Chloe revealed they had “one of the biggest rows… ever” while filming their new ITVBe show Chloe Madeley: A Family Affair.
The argument was over James, a former England Rugby World Cup star turned Ibiza DJ, posting photos “of other girls’ a***s” on Instagram.
Chloe previously told us: “My argument was, ‘I don’t mind that that is your job but I don’t want you putting it on social media when everyone knows I’m your wife.’”
Some of the couple’s recent rows have stemmed from former I’m A Celeb star James’s work as a DJ, which sees him away for “several days most weeks”.
Personal trainer Chloe, who balances part-time work and taking care of their daughter, admitted to The Sun that it has been “f***ing hard” but they are working through it.
She told us: “You’re on your own a lot and as anyone whose partner travels a lot will tell you, you do feel abandoned sometimes. So I try to reframe it.
“Some couples love having time apart but I’m the opposite. I like to be domestic, at home, with my partner so for someone like me – a stage five clinger – it is really hard.”
Like many new parents, they have struggled to find balance after the arrival of Bodhi in August last year.
Chloe told Bella magazine that they used to get “into a competition about who’s more tired” and “Who has done the bottles?”.
They managed to overcome that difficult period by spending more time together and Chloe has admitted she is “very proud” of what her husband has achieved.
Another thing that helped was hiring a part-time nanny, which allowed them to “figure out a rhythm” and spend quality time together because before there “wasn’t any time for each other”.
She told OK! that James had managed to balance his work with being “good dad” and a “good husband”.
Chloe explained: “I’m so impressed. He’ll sometimes say, ‘Let’s ask our nanny if she can work an extra hour tonight so we can go to the pub and have a glass of wine.’”
Jo tells us it is “a really good sign” that they have found a way to spend quality time with each other and especially that James “appears to be initiating it”.
She says: “It seems they are both drowning in the work-life balance and that would have had a big impact on the relationship.
“They have found a way out of that with childcare, that allows them freedom and quality time with each other. If he’s initiating it too, it’s a very positive sign that the relationship can be rescued.”
‘Thriving in chaos’
The couple has faced many marital hurdles over the years – including during her pregnancy when they had “multiple arguments” about James working away.
Jo believes setting boundaries can help too – such as “having regular calls and communication” – but it’s best to avoid structuring things too strictly.
She said: “I don’t think putting rules or restrictions would work on someone like James, or her for that matter, but they can look to share more and be open to avoid unnecessary concern.”
Previously, Chloe revealed their fiery personalities helped them to work through issues.
Chloe told OK!: “James and I are very tenacious as a couple. We’re still together after nine years because we hold on and we try really hard to figure things out even when it’s hard.”
She revealed “the biggest fight” they “ever had” stemmed from James booking a gig on Chloe’s due date – but they managed to work it out due to their playful bickering.
Chloe recalled: “I told him it was my f***ing due date and what he did, which really p***ed me off, was use my own statistic back against me – that less than 5% of babies are born on their due day.
“I lay in bed absolutely seething, thinking ‘well I’m just going to have to kill him’, whilst he was out DJ’ing with Carl Cox.
“Of course, the little thing was a week late. He was like ‘I told you so.’”
It’s one of many times James’s playful personality has shone through when things have become difficult in their relationship.
Previously, James jokingly admitted to “spending most of my life in the dog house” and on Instagram, his description reads “thriving in chaos”.
Sex life secrets & TV blunder
In the early days of their romance, Chloe and James regularly spilled the beans on their sex life.
When asked how often they got frisky, she told Fabulous: “Every night. That’s normal for us.
“We don’t have pets or kids, so we can. Going too long doesn’t agree with me mentally.”
She claimed James had slept with up to 1,000 people – despite never being told the true number of people he has had sex with.
But instead of seeing it negatively, Chloe said: “James had a very eventful life before we met but I reap the benefits of him being very experienced — so I’m fine with it.
“One thousand might be hyperbolic but knowing what I do about him, it’s definitely in the hundreds if not more.”
After James was evicted from I’m A Celebrity in 2019, the couple claimed they had a “sex marathon” – after he risked her wrath with an awkward TV blunder by claiming he preferred food to sex.
But in recent years, James and Chloe have been more quiet about their sex life, which Jo believes is a good thing.
“They probably should have kept it more quiet… in some ways speaking about it so much set a rod for their backs,” she says.
“Now if they are not talking about their sex lives some people may assume they are not having sex.”
Troll backlash
Chloe has had to defend her husband multiple times online – especially after being bombarded with comments on social media.
She fought back after trolls branded James a “s*** husband and father who doesn’t provide for his family” and questioned their relationship.
Jo says her defence of James was important because “if you don’t shut down speculation it will fuel itself”.
She added: “Social media scrutiny is hard and hurtful, especially when you’re going through a bad patch.
“But if she isn’t defending her marriage, she could appear to be complicit and agreeing with the trolls.”
‘Bold statement’
After photos emerged of James talking to a woman this month, a representative told us: “The woman pictured is a friend of James’s group who he just met that night. They were simply having a conversation outside so there is nothing to this story.”
Jo says “constant reassurance” is the best way for them to work around potential issues related to him being photographed with women while working as a DJ.
She added: “She needs to talk about how it makes her feel and for him to reassure her. They need to have that conversation on repeat when things are in a fragile state.”
At the same time, Chloe was photographed on a night out without her wedding ring, which Jo says may have been an unhelpful move while they try to better their communication.
She explained: “I think they need to remember how they resolved situations in the past and are perhaps in danger of going too public and outperforming each other in being reckless.
“I think Chloe hiding her wedding ring could be seen as a bold statement. Show stability, affection and kindness would have been better. It’s a dangerous road to go down when you present yourself as annoyed and that fuels speculation.”
Today a source has spoken out and insisted their relationship is still on track despite speculation.
The insider told OK! “They’re both strong characters who will inevitably clash, but equally, they know that’s why people are invested in them as a couple.
“No matter what the argument is, they’ll be fine afterward and brush it under the carpet. Chloe is one of the only people in the world who knows what James is really like.”